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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Meetings are a wonderful way to help your employees take a break from being productive.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

“I can’t wait to go back to bed tonight!” Me, 5 minutes after waking up.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I’ve never had a beer in the shower; I’m saving it for a very low moment in my life.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

“I’m just a girl!” No, you are a monster.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Always tell people different stories about yourself, so when they talk about you, they’ll argue.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1870 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,032

Funny Quotes Topics

14,821

Funny Quotes Images

12,032

22 seconds ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

In my defense, Your Honor, I was left unsupervised.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Damn, didn’t win the lottery. It’s messing up my budget plan.

Making waves on TikTok:

I’m as single as a one Dollar bill, and I don’t need any change.

Just shared via Facebook:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

Making waves on Discord:

Bruschetta is 80% delicious and 20% mess.

Going viral on Facebook:

Welcome to your 50s, your knees will now decide when you will sit down.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m feeling very anxious. I think this 7th mug of coffee will take the edge off.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’ve decided to become an organ donor. When I die, I want an elephant to get a new trunk.

Home » Funny Isolation Quotes » Page 3

24 Funny isolation quotes

More funny isolation quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: I’m so old, I used to block people by simply holding the door shut.

Commentary:
Ah, the good old days of manual blocking! Back in my day, no need for fancy buttons or technology, just good ol' elbow grease and determination! 💪🤣 #VintageBlockingTechniques
6 months ago
Share →: People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

Commentary:
"Oh, the sweet freedom of not having social plans! 😅 Who knew a global pandemic would make introverts feel like party animals? 🎉 #SorryNotSorry #IntrovertLife"
6 months ago
Share →: Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

Commentary:
"Sending out those invisible 'Do Not Disturb' vibes like a boss 😘🤫 Who needs coffee when you have the power of awkwardly blown kisses to keep everyone at bay? #ProfessionalAvoidanceStrategy"
6 months ago
Share →: “You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Commentary:
"Oh, just chilling with the best company ever – myself! Can't disappoint me, can't annoy me, can't steal my fries… Winning at life! 🕺🏼🤣 #JustMeMyselfAndI"

For even more funny isolation quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny isolation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1870 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,032

Funny Quotes Topics

14,821

Funny Quotes Images

12,032

22 seconds ago

3,455

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Brains are awesome. I wish I had one.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

My neighbor is having some kind of party and didn’t invite me. I guess I have to call the cops again.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

My brain is on airplane mode today.

Breaking via YouTube:

A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example: Jill ate her friend’s sandwich VS Jill ate her friend’s colon.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

If I was a priest, I’d make my side of the confession booth really big so I could run around.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

Reported on Threads:

Microdosing hell by checking the web every day.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Going viral on Telegram:

Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

Shared recently on Threads:

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Reported on Slack:

Watching as gravity slowly unfriends you.

Spotted on TikTok:

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

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