Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal cycle of kitchen woes: slaving away for hours to create a masterpiece, only for it to disappear in mere seconds, leaving behind a mountain of dishes that seems to reproduce on its own. It's like a twisted game of culinary whack-a-mole – just when you think you've conquered the kitchen, the dishes pop up again, laughing in the face of your clean plate aspirations."

I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

Commentary:
"Who needs anger management when you can just outsource the blame, right? It's all about efficiency – why work on yourself when you can just work on annoying others less?"

It's not that I want more shoes, it's just that they keep making them in my size.

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Commentary:
"Well, if the shoe fits… buy it in every color! It's not a shopping spree, it's a practical solution to a sizing problem."

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Commentary:
"Another productive day in the life of a couch tester! 🪑💼 Just making sure that seat cushion technology is up to par. Keep up the good work, couch potato! 🥔🛋️ #ProfessionalLounger"