Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

For my next trick, I’ll need a divorce lawyer.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Y’all need to stop marrying people who look just like you do but with a wig on.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

So my wife goes, “It’s not you — it’s me.” Obviously written by ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

I know breakfastless behavior when I see it.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

My curse was lifted. Do you want to hang out?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Zombies only eat brains, so you are safe.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,715

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t turn into a disaster.

Breaking via Reddit:

How great is it to do absolutely nothing and follow it up by taking a rest.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Seen just now on Instagram:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Just shared via Instagram:

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

Spotted on Pinterest:

There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

Just landed via Messenger:

Manifesting you in my bed.

Funny net quotes

Funny net quotes are the perfect way to brighten your day and share a laugh online 😂✨ Whether you need a quick mood boost or a cheeky caption for your feed, these witty gems have got you covered 📱🤣 Get ready to scroll through some hilarious takes, clever wordplay, and internet gold that’ll keep you chuckling all day long! Ready to LOL? Let’s dive into the funniest corners of the web! 🌐😄

New funny net quotes 👇

All funny net quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Discord this month:

Whatever y’all heard about me, I’m way worse.

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

And today, just like every day, I learned something new . . . but I’m old, so I forgot what it was already.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

74 shares on Threads this month:

Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

56 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

72 shares on Pinterest this month:

The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You aren’t a Teletubby.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I ordered mushrooms on my pizza. When do they kick in?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

“Inconvenience is the cost of community,” I repeat to myself as I climb six flights of stairs for my friend’s birthday party for her cat.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can’t find them.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

All of my problems boil down to me being bad at being alive.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

When your stomach is really mad at you, and you’re not sure which one of your 13 unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,751

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I sign all anniversary cards with ‘Way to commit to the bit!’

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Some days you have breakfast for dinner and live life on your own terms.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

They should invent a day where you aren’t tired.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

You can be anything when you grow up. For instance, I am very tired.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Womansplaining is when a woman tries to explain to you what you’re thinking/feeling, and is just totally 100% wrong.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

Santa’s elves listen to wrap music.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Trending via YouTube:

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Just waiting for my laundry to be done so I can pop it in the dryer and forget about it again.

Going bananas on X:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

To be happy as a man, you simply need to replace your screen time with beautiful women time.

Going viral on TikTok:

Forget Botox. If you really want to look younger, get braces.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Trending via Pinterest:

It’s always fun listening to someone’s lie when you already know the truth.

Trending via Facebook:

Software engineers are the dumbest smart people I’ve ever met.

Just landed via Messenger:

Babe, you’re not acting according to my delusions right now.

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