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I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.
Humble enough to know I can be replaced, but wise enough to know ain’t nobody else like me.
If I were in charge of Nike, I’d change the slogan to “Just Say You Did It. Nobody Ever Checks.”
Two mysterious people live in my house. “Somebody” and “Nobody.” Somebody did it and nobody knows who.
I wear sunglasses when I’m driving so nobody knows I’m asleep.

More funny nobody quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: If I were in charge of Nike, I’d change the slogan to “Just Say You Did It. Nobody Ever Checks.”

Commentary:
"If Nike ever adopts this new slogan, sales would skyrocket as people proudly flaunt their imaginary athletic achievements. 🏃‍♂️💨 Just remember, it only counts if you post about it on social media! #JustSayYouDidIt"
5 months ago
Share →: Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.

Commentary:
"Maybe all wolves need is some love and positive reinforcement to unleash their inner 'good boy' potential! 🐺🐶 Who knows, they might start wagging their tails instead of howling at the moon! 🌕😄"
5 months ago
Share →: Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the fine print of marriage: 'Ears not included.' 🤣 Who knew you had to pay extra for listening skills? 👂💸 #MarriageSurprises"
5 months ago
Share →: If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.

Commentary:
🥚🍻 "When life gives you eggs and alcohol, just remember – a tipsy Easter Bunny creates an eggcellent mystery hunt! 🐰🔍 Who needs a map when you have a magical blend of chaos and celebration?" 😉
5 months ago
Share →: Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Commentary:
"Looks like Big Bro's got a black belt in shifting blame! 🥋👊 Sibling rivalry at its finest! 😂 #ClassicSiblingDrama"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.

Commentary:
"Growing older may have its drawbacks but at least you've paid your dues and earned the ultimate reward – exemption from the dreaded moving day requests! 🚚💪 #AgingGracefully"
5 months ago
Share →: Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.

Commentary:
"Looks like you're so irresistible, even the mosquitoes can't resist you! 🦟💁‍♂️ Who needs human attention when you have a fan club of bloodsuckers, right? 😄 #MosquitoMagnet"
5 months ago
Share →: I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Commentary:
"Who knew that the generation gap would be measured in decibels… and mild annoyance levels? 🎵😂 Turns out, sometimes our ears need a break from the 'tunes' of the young folks! 🎧👴 #CrankyTunes"
5 months ago
Share →: I give such good nudes that nobody ever needs to ask me for a second one.

Commentary:
"Looks like this person's nude game is so strong, they're a one-hit wonder! 📷😄 No need for an encore when you nail it on the first try! 💁‍♂️👌"
5 months ago
Share →: Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Commentary:
"Dance like nobody's watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus…because you never know who's checking their list twice! 🎅🕵️‍♂️🙏 Keep those moves holy, secure, and definitely festive!"