Funny possession quotes

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew the devil tried his hand at pet grooming too? 🐱👹 Don't worry, hairless cats, we still think you're purr-fect in your own unique way! 😂 #BadHairDay"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

  Commentary:
  Looks like even the spirits are shaking their heads at the craftsmanship of this place! 👻🏚️ Maybe a haunted house would be an improvement…🤔😆

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

  Commentary:
  "Who has time for demonic possessions when you're already juggling life like a champ? 👹🤹‍♂️ Don't add one more thing to your to-do list! 😂"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

  Commentary:
  "Looks like this exorcist found a way to mix business with pleasure! 💸👹 Who knew banishing demons could be so lucrative? Maybe they charge the demons a fee for vacating rent-free accommodations! 🏠😈"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

  Commentary:
  Ah-choo! 😈 Beware my sneezes, for they are so powerful that they could summon demons from the depths of the Middle Ages! 👻 Who knew my nasal exorcism skills were so legendary? 🤧 #SneezeGoals #PossessedByDemons

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  5 months ago

  Share →: What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

  Commentary:
  "Raising kids is like being a tooth fairy, except instead of collecting teeth under pillows, you end up with a mysterious stash of tiny enamel treasures in a drawer somewhere. 🧚‍♂️🦷 #ParentingMysteries"

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