Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

Commentary:
Looks like even the spirits are shaking their heads at the craftsmanship of this place! 👻🏚️ Maybe a haunted house would be an improvement…🤔😆

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn't even notice it. With everything else I've got going on.

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

Commentary:
"Who has time for demonic possessions when you're already juggling life like a champ? 👹🤹‍♂️ Don't add one more thing to your to-do list! 😂"

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

Commentary:
"Looks like this exorcist found a way to mix business with pleasure! 💸👹 Who knew banishing demons could be so lucrative? Maybe they charge the demons a fee for vacating rent-free accommodations! 🏠😈"

My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

Commentary:
Ah-choo! 😈 Beware my sneezes, for they are so powerful that they could summon demons from the depths of the Middle Ages! 👻 Who knew my nasal exorcism skills were so legendary? 🤧 #SneezeGoals #PossessedByDemons

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

Commentary:
"Raising kids is like being a tooth fairy, except instead of collecting teeth under pillows, you end up with a mysterious stash of tiny enamel treasures in a drawer somewhere. 🧚‍♂️🦷 #ParentingMysteries"

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Commentary:
"Who knew the devil tried his hand at pet grooming too? 🐱👹 Don't worry, hairless cats, we still think you're purr-fect in your own unique way! 😂 #BadHairDay"