135 Funny right quotes

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  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I do block people right away; you’re not going to stress me out on my own phone, with my own internet, and in my own house.

  Commentary:
  "😂👌 'Not today, stress!' This phone's a drama-free zone! 📵🏡📶"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

  Commentary:
  "Just doing my civic duty as a professional 'not-my-fault' driver! 🚗💨⬇️ #BlameTheSnail"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: I don’t think I’ve ever made the right amount of pasta.

  Commentary:
  "When it comes to pasta, I either feed an army or a hamster! 🍝🤷‍♂️ #Pastatastrophes"

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  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.

  Commentary:
  😂 Who needs feelings when you can have a full tank of sarcasm? 🤖🛠️ #JokesOnly #UpgradeComplete

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

  Commentary:
  "Quick, someone call Ripley's Believe It or Not! 😆📵📱"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Just found out about confirmation bias, and now every article I read totally proves I was right to be worried about it.

  Commentary:
  "After reading up on confirmation bias, I've realized I'm absolutely biased about how biased I am! 🤔😂 #MindBlown #TotallyConfirmed"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

  Commentary:
  "Why be wrong when I can be right 24/7? Just ask me! 😄🗣️📚 #SelfProclaimedExpert"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Don’t fall for me — I’ll treat you right, and you’ll get bored and cheat.

  Commentary:
  "Better bring a lifejacket just in case! 🚣‍♂️😂 #SafetyFirst"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the mysterious phenomenon of the ever-hungry, elusive dinner-time child 🤔🍽️! It's like they possess a magical stomach that only grumbles at the most inconvenient times. Maybe we should start serving appetizers during the main course to keep them satisfied! 🤣 #KidsAndTheirHungryWays

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they don’t know what it means.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic military acronym mystery – it's like cracking a code during every conversation! 🕵️‍♂️🤔 Maybe next time we can throw in a prize for the most creative acronym guess! 🏆😂

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