24 Funny side quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you want to know who the bad guys are, it is the side who wants you arrested for memes and jokes.

  Commentary:
  "Watch out for those meme-criminals! 🕵️‍♂️💻 Arresting people for jokes? Sounds like a job for the Pun Police! 🚨👮‍♂️ Remember, humor is not a crime… unless it's dad jokes. Then maybe it should be 🤣 #FreeTheMemes"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Crazy that caffeine has no short or long-term negative side effects. Just a super drug from God.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, caffeine – the ultimate 'miracle' drug straight from the heavens! ☕️🙌 No short or long-term negative side effects, just pure energy and questionable life choices. Who needs angels when you've got a good old cup of joe to guide you through the day? 😜☕️ #DivineEnergyBoost"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Tiime isn’t on my side, it’s on my face, wrinkling my forehead.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the classic battle against time – always winning as it leaves its marks on our faces! ⏳👴🏻 Who needs a clock when your forehead shows the passing hours? Embrace the wrinkles, they are just a reminder that laughter and frowns both contribute to life's story! Just remember to smile, it's nature's Botox! 😄 #TimelessAndWrinkled

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job.

  Commentary:
  🐶😒 "My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job. Honestly, if side-eyeing was a paying gig, my furball would be living his best life! Maybe I should start charging him rent for all that sassy attitude." 😄 #UnemployedButUnbothered

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  5 months ago

  Share →: And then there are people who can only sleep on their back because their pea brain could slip out of their ear if they lie on their side.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the delicate balance of sleeping positions! 😂 These are the kind of folks who take 'pea brain' quite literally! 🧠💤 #BackSleeperDilemma"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

  Commentary:
  "Watch out world, this year I'm not only reaching for the stars, but also making sure the extraterrestrials have my back 👽🚀 Who knows, maybe they'll invite me for a ride on their spaceship! #TeamAlien"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If I was a priest, I’d make my side of the confession booth really big so I could run around.

  Commentary:
  "If I was a priest, I'd need a confession marathon booth to fully utilize my running skills! 🏃‍♂️🕍 Who says penance can't be a cardio workout? 😉"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the power of watching people dance while listing side effects—truly mesmerizing! 💃💊 Maybe I should try busting a move next time I talk about potential risks of overeating chocolate… 🍫💃 Just imagine the "chocolate overdose cha-cha"!

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew being a shark's meal could make you feel so unique? 🦈 Just remember, if life gives you lemons, make lemonade… or in this case, shark bait! 😅 Stay positive, right? Stay fin-tastic, my friend! 🌊"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: The Secret Service was chasing me but I painted a tunnel on the side of a wall and they all ran into it.

  Commentary:
  Looks like someone's been taking tips from the one and only Road Runner 🏃‍♂️🎨🚙! Nothing like a little creativity to outsmart the Secret Service, eh? Just be careful not to drop any anvils on their heads next time 😉💥.

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