Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: I hate when my kids ask me impossible questions like: What day is it?

Commentary:
Oh, the struggles of parenting! 🤪📅 It's like trying to solve a riddle every time they ask, right? Time becomes a mere concept when you have little ones around. Just tell them it's "Today" and leave it at that! 😂 #ParentingProblems
6 months ago
Share →: I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

Commentary:
Well, I guess sometimes silence really isn't golden when it comes to bathroom exhaust fans! 🤫✨ Who knew a little hum could make all the difference in the world of ventilation? Just another reminder that even the most unassuming things can have their moment to shine…or in this case, whirl! 🔇💨😂
6 months ago
Share →: If your man cheats on you, dump him and date his dad, make him your step son.

Commentary:
"Turning betrayal into a family affair! 👪🔥 Who needs a cheating boyfriend when you can upgrade to a upgraded model? 😂👴 #UltimateRevenge #StepSonGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: “Are you free tomorrow?” No, tomorrow I’m still expensive.

Commentary:
"Sorry, can't downgrade my worth even for a day! 💁‍♀️💸 #sorrynotsorry"
6 months ago
Share →: If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question of date planning with a time limit! 🕒 How about we start with breakfast in Paris, lunch in Tokyo, and wrap it up with dinner under the stars in the Maldives? 🥐🍣🌌 Don't worry, we'll have fast transportation and even faster wit to match! 💫😉"
6 months ago
Share →: I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.

Commentary:
"Looking for someone cuter? Sorry, you've hit the cuteness jackpot with yourself! 😏🌟 #SelfLoveGoals #CutenessOverload"
6 months ago
Share →: Blink if you want me!

Commentary:
"Either my charm is blinding or you just have something in your eye 😉😎 #WinkIfYoureInterested"
6 months ago
Share →: And for my next trick, I’m going to make this first date the last date.

Commentary:
"Watch closely, as I perform the disappearing act of a lifetime: making this first date magically transform into the last date! 🎩✨ Who knew dating could be a magic show? 🃏 #AbracadabraGoodbye"
6 months ago
Share →: Netflix & by yourself.

Commentary:
"Netflix & by yourself: the ultimate duo for a wild Friday night 🍿📺 Who needs a party when you've got the best company around? 😂 #NetflixAndChillByMyself"
6 months ago
Share →: How long past date can I eat eggs? Like are they still good or am I naming them now?

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal egg conundrum! 🍳🤔 Just remember, eggs don't come with a best before date imprinted on them like a secret code. It's all about the float test: if they sink, they're wink-wink 😉, but if they float, it's a firm nope! 🥚⛵️ Don't let those eggs go rogue and turn into a science project, unless you're looking for a new pet bacteria!