11 Funny hiring quotes

• Jobs be asking me for 3 references, and I think I might start doing the same. Like, let me talk to 3 happy employees, please.

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  3 hours ago

  3, asking, doing, employee, employees, happy, hiring, humor, i, interview, job, jobs, let, me, please, reference, references, same, start, talk, think, workplace

• Best friends should be able to apply to jobs together and get hired as a set.

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  23 hours ago

  able, application, best, best friend, friend, friends, friendship, hiring, humor, job, jobs, set, should, teamwork, together

• I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

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  3 weeks ago

  business, candid, hate, hire, hiring, humor, i, interview, job, just, me, real, stand

• Dear unsuccessful applicant, we ultimately decided to split the role between existing staff without paying any of them extra.

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  2 months ago

  decision, employment, existing, extra, hiring, humor, job, management, office, paying, role, salary, staff, staffing, workplace

• If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the work of 3-5 people.

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  2 months ago

  35, company, employment, grow, growth, hiring, humor, job, office, people, sign, us, work, workload

• They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

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  2 months ago

  actually, after, application, employment, hire, hiring, humor, invent, job, job rejection, job search, rejection, search, should, wants

• Like many men my age, my biggest regret is hiring the inexpensive hitman.

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  2 months ago

  age, hiring, hitman, men, regret

• Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

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  2 months ago

  death, hiring, humor, i, irony, joke, makeup, mortician, sleep

• If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

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  3 months ago

  company, grow, hiring, humor, job, people, sign, work, workload

• Hired a financial advisor, and his first piece of advice was that I don’t make nearly enough money to justify paying a financial advisor.

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  3 months ago

  advice, advisor, budgeting, cost, enough, finance, financial, financial advisor, hiring, humor, i, money, paying, personal, personal finance, piece

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