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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I think God was high when he made me.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Save tons of money on a weighted blanket by sleeping under the mattress.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

At what point is a salad no longer a salad based on how much bacon I add?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

“AI is coming for your jobs”. I’d like to see AI show up drunk on Fridays and sexually harass my coworkers.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Despite all my rage, I still keep refreshing the page.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

5 hours ago

Users Online

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

I cannot definitively say, even after all I’ve seen, that I would not visit Jurassic Park.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

Trending via WeChat:

If you love someone be brave enough to tell them. Otherwise be brave enough to watch them dating someone else.

Trending via Messenger:

Words I heard most when I ran errands with my dad: “Wait in the truck.”

Breaking via Telegram:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Making waves on Instagram:

Everyone is always talking about raising money for dogs without homes, but what about the ones who don’t have cars?

Reported on Facebook:

One of the weirdest things about being an adult is having a favorite stove top burner. No one ever talks about it, but y’all know it’s true.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

As a parent you get to see just how much a baby accomplishes in its first year of life. Because you’re awake for all of it.

Spotted on Messenger:

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

Home » Funny Neatness Quotes

Funny neatness quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

5 hours ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

All the wrong decisions in this country are based on the fact that my balcony faces out the back and so I can’t speak to the people.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Life is so dull when you don’t have someone to flirt with.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the last twelve digits of Pi.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Cooking with glasses on is so humiliating. Why did I just get blinded by steam?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

I really wish people would stop thinking they need to speak to me in the mornings.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

The romantic says that there is the right partner for everyone. The realist says: only one person has to choose the wrong one and then it won’t work out for everyone!

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

To get my cat to eat, I tell him about all the hungry cats in Catfrica.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

Going viral on Facebook:

Why call it a “step dad” when you could have called it a faux pas?

Trending via Facebook:

I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

Going viral on Telegram:

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I have nothing nice to wear for the government shutdown.

Trending via Reddit:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

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