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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

If, I, want to, put, a comma, there, then, I will put, the comma, there.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Everyone is a genius until they try to use someone else’s microwave.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Probably the most depressed I’ve ever been in my life, except for a bunch of other times.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Who you are when someone reaches over to take food from your plate… is the real you.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I’m officially at the age where going out on the weekend just means I’m running errands.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,824

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

Missionary, so I can look him in the eyes and ask him why Ashley from work is texting him with heart eyes.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Going to look at the small picture for a while. Tired of seeing the big picture. Too much picture.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Just landed via Telegram:

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

Going viral on TikTok:

In your 20s, there will be a cat, and it is very important to get that cat and spend so much money on it.

Spotted on Discord:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Trending via Instagram:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.

Making waves on Slack:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

13 Funny pet humor quotes

Funny pet humor quotes bring endless smiles and belly laughs 🐶😹! Whether your furball is a mischievous troublemaker or a goofy cuddle bug, these witty sayings capture their quirky charm perfectly 🐾😂. Get ready to brighten your day with pawsome humor that celebrates all the silly, lovable moments our pets gift us daily 🐕🎉!

New funny pet humor quotes 👇

For even more funny pet humor quotes, hit next 👇

All funny pet humor quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on TikTok this month:

Perks of being a girl: You can think about whatever you want in public without worrying about boners.

65 shares on Instagram this month:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

64 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Is it just me, or does anybody else get excited about cancelling plans?

23 shares on YouTube this month:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

The wind is about to blow me to Oz, so if you see me flying past your window, mind your business.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t abuse substances. I cherish and nurture them.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

My body is a machine that turns traumatic experiences into 10 likes on X.

42 shares on Telegram this month:

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

Women are actually very understanding if you’re honest with them, especially if they like you. You don’t even have to do all that lying.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Just found out my 84-year-old neighbour is on his own tomorrow, so I’ve just been over to collect his spare chairs to borrow.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t truly refer to yourself as an adult until you catch yourself getting really angry when the grocery store changes their layout.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

That one friend who has a dangerously loose grasp on food safety.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Main difference between me and my jokes is that folks don’t laugh at my jokes.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

13 folks are currently checking 👀

These cannot be the same knees that used to get low in heels at the club.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,993

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

There are 8 billion people in the world and I only have 3 friends, and one is annoying.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

I named my dog “5 Miles,” so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

It’s comical when I lean back in my chair only to realize it’s a stool.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Standing like a flamingo at my kitchen counter eating watermelon is such a vibe.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

The purpose of life is to go insane sooner or later.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

I can relate to God because it also takes me a full week to finish something that still kind of sucks.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

I’m rearranging the kitchen which is devastating for my husband because now suddenly he remembers where everything used to be.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Hey (with the intention of going to sleep).

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

I disagree with my politics.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

They should make a Wikipedia for normal people. I should be able to google my barista.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Spotted on Telegram:

People who think naps are a waste of time obviously don’t understand how naps work.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I think Bigfoot had it right, stay in hiding from all the shitty human beings.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Sorry, but I don’t think we should see each other anymore. Your Katana skills are lacking.

Trending via Twitch:

Do you ever hang out with someone else’s family, and you’re like, ooooh, so this is what it’s supposed to be like?

Spotted on Twitch:

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I get it cicadas, I’m ready to scream for six weeks too.

Breaking via Slack:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

If history repeats itself, I’m getting a pet dinosaur.

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