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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Betrayal only comes from someone we’re close to. Just like herpes.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

It’s romantic to fall in love during the collapse of society.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Is the elephant in the room with us right now?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,418

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If you add orange juice to Jason Momoa, you get a Jason Mimosa.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Frodo is a beautiful name for a boy. Has a ring to it.

Live now on Facebook:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Anyone who deals with customers on a professional basis should be allowed to hand out one face slap per day.

Making waves on Threads:

Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

Going viral on Twitch:

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Reported on YouTube:

When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

Just shared via Reddit:

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

I miss the good ol’ days until I remember things like having to get out of my chair and smack the TV to get a clearer picture.

I miss the good ol’ days until I remember things like having to get out of my chair and smack the TV to get a clearer picture.
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Commentary:
Ah, the nostalgia for simpler times…when "adjusting the antenna" was a high-stakes mission requiring Jedi-like precision and a firm hand! 📺💥 Who needs streaming services when you've got the power of percussive maintenance, am I right? 😉 #ThrowbackThursdays #TheOriginalRemoteControl

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,422

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

The best cuddles are the ones where you don’t have to deflate her when you’re done.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Welcome to middle age, where you wake up hungover whether you’ve had a drink or not.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

“You look nervous” Thanks, I’ve been practicing my whole life.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand, but I also don’t care… so it works out.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

My diet was going really well until I woke up.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

Going viral on Slack:

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

Shared recently on Threads:

Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

Broadcasted on Facebook:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Almonds are a scam. They are wood. You are eating wood.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Being on a diet isn’t so bad if you don’t follow it.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Basically a lot of my problems boil down to me being really bad at waking up, and also really bad at going to sleep.

Seen just now on YouTube:

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

Making waves on Pinterest:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, begging for my cat’s attention.

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