Funny quotes right Page 5

119 Funny right quotes

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

The pizza delivery guys say “see you tomorrow” to everyone, right?

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

I never argue, I just explain why I’m right.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

I think this man might be the one, I say right before he dumps me and I never hear from him again.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

When someone says “I don’t want a relationship right now” the “at least not with you” is silent.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025