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New funny quotes: 10783 this month

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Updated: May 26, 2026

 

 

 

 

38 Funny decision making quotes

Funny decision making quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments when you just can’t decide 🤔😂 From second-guessing to last-minute flips, these witty lines capture the chaos of choosing with a smile 😅✨ Whether you’re a master of indecision or just love a good laugh, get ready to enjoy some clever takes on the art of making up your mind! 🎯🤣

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I love asking 5 different people for advice then doing what I want.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Going to ask seven friends for advice and then execute my original plan.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

Posted onMay 23, 2026

When I am calculating any risk, I think to myself: is this first cat life behavior? Or ninth cat life behavior?

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Maybe we should put monkeys in charge for a while just to see how it goes.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Changing your mind is an underrated activity.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Girlhood is taking hundreds of pictures only to post one or none at all.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Marriage is just asking each other, “What do you want to do for dinner?” and then replying, “No, not that,” until death do us part.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I regret to inform you that we must all once again figure out what to make for dinner tonight.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I used to love going out with people. Now I weigh the pros and cons of human interaction, like it’s a business decision.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

For your own sanity, always take mixed signals as a no.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Masturbation is easy, but choosing a video is hard.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Hey, I’ve been thinking, and I think you should think for me.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

“I’m going to try underthinking about a situation, and see if that works.”

Posted onMar 31, 2026

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Trying to decide what to burn for dinner, so I can order pizza.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Have I made bad decisions when I was drunk? Sure. But have the sober ones been any better? Not really.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Big decision to make? Sleep on it. Have a nightmare. Then you’ll be operating on pure adrenaline and will choose more quickly.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

Posted onMar 30, 2026

There should be guide dogs that prevent you from making bad decisions.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Do beavers even know what they’re doing, or do they just see water flowing down a river and think, “Absolutely not”?

Posted onMar 30, 2026

I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

Posted onMar 30, 2026

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

Posted onMar 29, 2026

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

Posted onMar 29, 2026

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