294 Funny think quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: It’s not you. Just the things you say, think, and do.

  Commentary:
  Ah, I see we're playing the classic game of "It's not you, it's everything about you". 🤔💬 On the bright side, at least it's specific feedback, right? 🌟😅 Just a little something to keep in mind when you're planning your next stand-up comedy routine! 🎤🤣

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

  Commentary:
  🎉🥳 "I'm done with making resolutions! It's about time the years step up their game and start being better, don't you think? 😆 Let's see some improvement, 2022! #NewYearSameMe" 🙌

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

  Commentary:
  "Watch out world, someone's about to hit us with a plot twist! 🎉 Hold on tight, it's gonna be a rollercoaster ride! 🎢😄 #PlotTwistOfTheYear"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like that package is stealing the spotlight! 📦🏠 Don't worry, it's just a delivery, not an audition for 'Home Alone 5'! 😂 #PackageDrama"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

  Commentary:
  "Self-checkout cameras: turning everyday shopping trips into dramatic episodes of our own lives since forever! 💸📸😱 #SelfieScare #DramaticShopping"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I like to think of myself as an onion. Peel back the many layers and deep down inside you’ll find a smaller, more anxious onion.

  Commentary:
  "Peeling back the layers of the human experience is like unearthing an onion… only to discover a world of anxiety hiding within! 🧅😅 Just remember, even the most anxious onions have their own unique flavor to add to the potpourri of life! 🌟 #OnionLayersOfEmotions"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the multitasking mastery of adulthood! 🧦👟 Why stop at just tying shoes when you can also contemplate the secrets of the universe or solve world hunger, right? 🤔💭 Keep reaching for the stars, even from tying your shoelaces! 🌟👞 #AdultingGoals

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Nobody knows what to do with me and I just think that’s beautiful.

  Commentary:
  Well, as the saying goes: "Why fit in when you were born to stand out?" 💁‍♀️ Embrace your uniqueness and keep everyone guessing – it's the perfect recipe for a little extra sprinkle of mystery and charm! 🌟✨😄

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I think humans are meant to lay in bed with the love of their life all winter.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs hibernation when you have love to keep you warm all winter? 😏❤️ Just make sure your significant other doesn't hog the blankets! 🛌🔥 #WinterSnuggles"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.

  Commentary:
  🎅🏼🎁📆 "Santa: the ultimate part-time worker and full-time judge. Must be nice to only work one day a year and spend the rest making his list and checking it twice! 😂📝 #SantaClausIsComingToTown"

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