Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Oh, so you're not running late, you're just on the avant-garde of time perception! 🕒😄 Who knew being fashionably late was just the artistic expression of your temporal genius? 🎨⏳

creative, humor, interpretation, just, late, procrastination, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

2 months ago

cubicle, employee, employee handbook, handbook, humor, i, life, me, noise, office, office life, show, weird, weird noise, where, workplace, workplace humor
Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

2 months ago

adult, cook, cooking, dinner, life, night, single
Asian parents give you unmoanable names so you can focus on your studies.

6 months ago

Asian, Asian parent, cultural, cultural stereotype, focus, give, humor, name, names, parent, parents, stereotype, study
A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

1 month ago

attraction, communication, flirting, reach, reach out, thinking, urge, woman
The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

2 weeks ago

aging, amount, discovery, family, humor, older, secret, secrets, wild
Every time I use a Windows computer, it’s like they built malware into the OS. Like, what do you mean there are ads in the start menu?

1 week ago

ad, ads, built, computer, every, experience, humor, i, malware, mean, menu, operating, operating system, software, start, start menu, system, technology, time, user, user experience, Windows

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on Twitch this month:

If a man speaks in the forest and his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

92 shares on Facebook this month:

I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.

94 shares on X this month:

I’m only drinking a lot of beer tonight because I need the room in the fridge.

66 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Just got some minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

Not today, Satan, but next week works.

46 shares on X this month:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

69 shares on Discord this month:

Tell me I’d look good in a potato sack or lose me forever.

85 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

62 shares on Slack this month:

You gotta separate the art from the artist. Like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

I bought a little notebook to keep track of who’s above the law.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

If you’re lost in the woods, start talking loudly about politics. Someone will come to argue with you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Spotted on Instagram:

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

Trending via Threads:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

Going viral on YouTube:

What was the main bloke called in Harry Potter?

Trending via WhatsApp:

People will say “sounds good” at work when things don’t sound good at all.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Whoever created / mandated the auto start-stop feature on cars should be dragged into the town square to be tarred and feathered!

Just shared via Discord:

I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

You know you’re getting old when you get mad at some random car parked outside your house.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m not “late”, I’m just very creative with my interpretation of “time”.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

Asian parents give you unmoanable names so you can focus on your studies.

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

Every time I use a Windows computer, it’s like they built malware into the OS. Like, what do you mean there are ads in the start menu?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨