Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? Here, but fatter.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Your suitcase just texted. It’s getting bored.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Stop worrying if people like you. They don’t.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

I’m not into casual sex. Send me a résumé.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Nothing is complicated when you’re simple-minded like me.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Me liking your post is the equivalent of an angel kissing your forehead.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Stop blaming everyone for all of your problems. Pick the one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

We should bring gargoyles back, more buildings need freaky little guys on them.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

My hair would never allow me to commit a crime. I really do leave my DNA everywhere.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Fleetwood Mac said that I could go my own way, your honor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,511

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

People will think you know what you’re talking about if you give your opinion while cleaning a pair of reading glasses.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

A vibrator is amazing but it doesn’t call me “good girl” unfortunately.

Spotted on Facebook:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

Just shared via Slack:

I only squeak when I’m squoken to.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Just landed via Snapchat:

To the tune of ‘Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

Going viral on Snapchat:

Deleted all dating apps, instead I’m just going to walk into a grocery store and look confused.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Going viral on X:

Where does everyone go to get kisses? I haven’t figured this out yet.

Just landed via Slack:

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

I’m the kind of crazy you weren’t warned about because no one knew this level existed.

2 weeks ago

Witty quote about embracing unexpected levels of craziness, playful and humorous tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Surprise! I'm the secret level boss of crazy you never knew you needed to defeat! 🤪🎮 Who knew there were extra levels of craziness waiting to be unlocked! 🤯🔓 Get ready for some unexpected plot twists in this game of life! 🎭🕹️"

crazy, existed, humor, level, personality, unexpected, warned

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on Facebook this month:

It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

99 shares on Threads this month:

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

Juggling screen time is the ultimate multitasking Olympics.

34 shares on X this month:

Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m the type of idiot to be loyal during the talking stage.

49 shares on Reddit this month:

My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’ve never been hit with gay allegations, you’re not fly enough.

22 shares on Threads this month:

Leaving out milk and cookies for Santa is literally making an offering to a deity.

87 shares on Twitch this month:

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

I can’t believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician. I was just sitting there doing nothing.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt!

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Burger King implies the existence of an entire burger based feudal system.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I need to consult the woods about this.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun to not be able to open that drawer.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Being a writer means having a story you want everyone in the world to read, except anyone who knows you.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,362

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

My favorite things about Twitter are that everything you read is true, everyone is nice, and all intentions are pure of heart.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

ASAP (as sapphic as possible).

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Apparently, the job interviewer doesn’t like it when your biggest weakness is beautiful Latinas.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Today, I started a 28-day no-swearing challenge, which I will restart tomorrow.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

On average, my daily actions demonstrate I’m probably good at something else.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

By now, we’ve all figured out that these LED bulbs don’t actually last 15 years, but we’ve collectively decided to just let it slide.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Being a writer means canceling your plans so you have time to write, and then spending hours avoiding writing.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

Trending via Slack:

The tarot lady on my TikTok said that you miss me.

Just shared via Reddit:

I wish British people had subtitles so I knew what they are on about.

Seen just now on Threads:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Going viral on YouTube:

“I’m basically the human version of finding $20 in old jeans.”

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If my trainee says “oh God” one more time, he’s going to meet him.

Just shared via Telegram:

A pretty girl like me should be in the sky, sitting on a star.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Seeing a grown man stumble when the train moves is disgusting. How will you provide for anyone?

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