Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I thought I needed a drink. Turns out what I really needed was a divorce.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

My credit score is a family of raccoons hissing over a McRib.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Asking for a donation like Wikipedia every time someone asks me a question.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Finally got around to emptying the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something started its independence movement in there.