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New funny quotes 👇

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
Me waking up: wow, I can't wait to go to sleep tonight.

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
I would rather lose you than the argument.

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
If my neighbors would just talk a little louder I could follow along with their conversation, but no. Rude.

If my neighbors would just talk a little louder I could follow along with their conversation, but no. Rude.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year's? Now we're old and cursing because we're staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed.

Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year’s? Now we’re old and cursing because we’re staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
My muffin top has become a full blown birthday cake.

My muffin top has become a full blown birthday cake.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl's picture.

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.

I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025
If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I'd just laugh and search with them.

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

Funny Quotes Jan 19, 2025