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Commentary:
"30s: Let's dance the night away and show off our moves! 💃🕺 50s: Let's find a comfy spot on that couch and enjoy the party with a drink in hand! 🍸🛋️"

50, aging, couch, dance, getting old

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

2 months ago

chair, comfort, dance, funny observation, me, nightclub, nightlife, observation, party, social, where
The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

2 months ago

casual, comfort, comfortable, cozy, downtime, feet, foot, foot up, highlight, leisure, me, me time, putting, relaxation, self-care, slipping, something, time, weekend
When I die, I hope it’s early in the morning, so I don’t have to go to work that day for no reason.

2 months ago

day, death, die, early, hope, humor, i, life, morning, motivation, procrastination, reason, work
Leave me alone, man. I’m just living my life like a candle in the wind.

2 months ago

alone, attitude, candle, candle in the wind, humor, independence, just, leave, life, living, man, me, personal, personal space, space, wind
If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

2 months ago

boundary, car, comfort, driving, elbow, humor, little, middle, passenger, personal, personal space, piece, riding, space, yours
Lately life has been all panic no disco.

2 months ago

disco, fun, humor, life, music, panic, party, stress

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Snapchat this month:

I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Who is this Rorschach guy and where did he get all the pictures of my parents fighting?

51 shares on Facebook this month:

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I have now spread out a blue tarpaulin in the garden. I want it to look like I have a pool on Google Maps.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

Me, as a therapist: “OMG, me too!”

37 shares on Snapchat this month:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

22 shares on X this month:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

61 shares on Telegram this month:

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

39 shares on Pinterest this month:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

My wallet is empty, just like my soul.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Reading is a gateway drug to being less stupid.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

All of humanities problems could be solved with a large meteor.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Rewatching Avengers: Age of Ultron. Despite the title, they never tell you how old Ultron is.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Applying lip balm when you know someone’s watching you is a power move.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Meetings are great because who doesn’t like being held hostage?

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

Making waves on Reddit:

If you think you’re going to be in a dangerous situation, dress accordingly. Don’t wear flip-flops to a bank robbery, for example.

Shared recently on Twitch:

The angel and devil on my shoulders are both completely fed up with me.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I often wonder how men could discover entire continents. Mine can’t even find the butter in the fridge.

Trending via Facebook:

A moment of silence for the paycheck that was in my account for five minutes.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.

Trending via Instagram:

Losing a white tee to a stain is a different kind of grief.

Spotted on Telegram:

Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

Making waves on Reddit:

Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

Live now on Discord:

Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

30s: Oh look, a dance floor! 50s: Oh look, a couch!

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

When I die, I hope it’s early in the morning, so I don’t have to go to work that day for no reason.

Leave me alone, man. I’m just living my life like a candle in the wind.

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Lately life has been all panic no disco.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨