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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

They say you should dress for the job you want then send you home as “the stormtrooper suit is not appropriate work attire”.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Giving every single movie I watch a five star review because it’s just such a joy to be alive.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

For a girl that loves sleep and hates stress, my career choice is questionable.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Keep your temper. Nobody else wants it.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

1pm, the perfect time to start doing the work I woke up early to get a jump on.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Next time I feel incompetent at my job, I hope I remember that someone once pushed a live software update that crashed half the planet.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I always thought orthopaedic shoes were overrated, but I stand corrected.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

Updated

6 hours ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

You’re my least favourite notification.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t understand, but I also don’t care, so it works out.

Spotted on Instagram:

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

Just landed via Instagram:

The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Thank God I have a cat. Who else is gonna shit in this box I have?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

Home » Funny Activity Quotes » Page 11

637 Funny activity quotes

More funny activity quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Your coworkers are your friends; stop working and hang out.

Commentary:
"When 'team bonding' turns into an unscheduled ‘coffee break championship’! ☕🏆🤣 #Priorities"
2 months ago
Share →: The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Commentary:
"Pretty sure my brain installed an invisible reset button at the door! 🤔🔄😂"
2 months ago
Share →: The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Commentary:
"Board games really bring out my alter ego: 'Competitive Cathy' 😈🎲 Who knew a simple game of Monopoly could cause inner monster mayhem?" 🤣🏰
2 months ago
Share →: Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

Commentary:
"Enthusiasm level: 100. Motivation to get off the couch: -5 😂🛋️🙃"
2 months ago
Share →: Being an adult is getting excited about buying new appliances.

Commentary:
"When your heart skips a beat because your toaster has a bagel button! 🥯✨ #AdultLifeGoals"
2 months ago
Share →: Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

Commentary:
"Who knew avoiding awkward encounters was the ultimate cardio workout? 😂🏃‍♂️💨 #WalmartOlympics"
2 months ago
Share →: Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

Commentary:
"Who knew 'extreme dirt sports' would be the hottest way to unwind? 😂🌱☀️ #GardenWarrior"
2 months ago
Share →: Seeing people exercising outside my house really motivated me to get up and close the blinds.

Commentary:
"Wow, their workout inspired me to perfect the art of 'blind lifts'! 😂🏋️‍♂️🚪"
2 months ago
Share →: The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

Commentary:
"When you've lost her at the thumbnail but you're still hoping for a chuckle. 🎥😅 #WishfulThinking"
2 months ago
Share →: If I had a boyfriend, I’d watch him dig a hole at the beach and be like, “Wowww, baby, good job. That’s a beautiful hole.

Commentary:
"Nothing screams romance like a man with a shovel and a dream! 😂🏖️👷‍♂️ #SandcastleGoals"

For even more funny activity quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

People that ask Grok “Is this true” are the reason our society is getting dumber by the minute.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Statistically speaking, people don’t object enough at weddings.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

It’s not getting better or worse, but rather a third mysterious thing.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Sorry I can’t come today. My sister’s friend’s mother’s grandpa’s brother’s grandson’s uncle’s fish died, and it was tragic.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

My kids didn’t follow me into the bathroom so now I’m scared to leave and find out what they got into instead.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

The worst part of my grandfather’s dementia was slowly watching him forget about Dre.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

Just shared via YouTube:

Girls be like, “I know a spot,” then sacrifice you under the full moon.

Spotted on Telegram:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

Making waves on TikTok:

“I’m a very sleepy person, just at all the wrong times.”

Just landed via Discord:

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The worst is when it’s too late to take a nap but too early to go to bed.

Breaking via Reddit:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Just shared via Threads:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Just landed via WeChat:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

637 Funny activity quotes

More funny activity quotes 👇

For even more funny activity quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Every time I talk, it sounds like it’s my first time trying to speak.

“Is this a joke to you?” Unfortunately, everything is a little bit of a joke to me.

So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

If you’re going to stare all night and not say hello, do you mind taking your fingers and squishing my head from across the room?

If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’m going to bed, everyone. Try to keep it down.

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

Even if there’s a murderer behind me, finish chewing before you tell me.

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