223 Funny back quotes

• 

  5 days ago

  Share →: It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

  Commentary:
  "Seriously, I followed the IT troubleshooting steps: nap taken, brain restarted, headache should be GONE! 😆🤯 #NapFails"

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: Every guy wants to be called Daddy till that test comes back positive.

  Commentary:
  "When 'Who's your daddy?' takes a plot twist! 😅🍼 #UnexpectedPositivity"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

  Commentary:
  "Priorities: Ice cream 1, Charger 0! 🍦🔌😅"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Reverse cowgirl is not a fair trade because, why do you get a view of my sexy back, and all I’m seeing are your toes throwing gang signs?

  Commentary:
  "When you're expecting a romantic view but get toe-tally surprised instead! 🤦‍♂️👣🤣"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

  Commentary:
  "When I finally remember to reply, I'm basically sending a message from the Paleolithic era. 📜😂🦖"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

  Commentary:
  "Guess I'm on their do-not-en-banh mi list! 🍞🚫😂 #PhoRealTho"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: The male urge to tell you what business used to be located there back in his day.

  Commentary:
  "Ah yes, behold the ancient tales of the great Taco Bell that once stood where this Starbucks now reigns! 🏺📜😂"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

  …

  Commentary:
  "BRB, just unscrewing my spine like it's IKEA furniture! 🛠️😂 #SpinalSpaDay"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Love the travel stories, but maybe it's time for a return trip! 🚀😄✈️"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

  …

  Commentary:
  "When your life's playlist is a little too *sharp* 🎵 and your inbox is a little too *flat* 📱😂!"

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