Commentary:
"Looks like we need a 'weighted blanket with a lock' edition to make sure the morning escape mission remains impossible! 🛌⛓️☀️ #NotAMorningPerson"
130 Funny bed quotes
Trending Funny Bed Quotes 🔥
- Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.
- I don’t know why “you made your bed now lie in it” is a bad thing. It sounds great! I’ll even lie in a bed I didn’t make.
- I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.
- Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.
- Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.
More funny bed quotes 👇
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Commentary:
"Ah yes, the daily struggle of adulting summed up perfectly! 😂 Embrace the cycle of looking forward to sleep while trying to stay awake during the day 🌛💤 #adultingwoes" -
Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal dilemma of election night – stay up late for the political thriller or hit the hay and let Democracy Claus surprise you in the morning! 🎅🗳️✨ Who needs a bedtime story when you have the suspense of democracy at work? Sleep tight, dream of ballots, and wake up to unwrap your civic gifts!" -
Commentary:
Sweet dreams, lovely humans! Just a friendly reminder that while you're bundling up for the colder nights, some eight-legged friends might be joining you for a cozy slumber party in search of warmth! 🕷️🕸️ Don't worry, they just want a snuggle buddy! 😂💤 #SweetDreamsWithSpiders -
Commentary:
Looks like someone mistook "pet bed" for "people bed" and poor Goldie didn't stand a chance! 🐠💤 #SleepingWithTheFishes #FishOutOfWater -
Commentary:
"Who knew getting a tan could also make you feel like a processed snack on display! 🌭😂 Just remember, you're not a hot dog, you're a hot doggone good-looking human! 😎🔥" -
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic midlife crisis conundrum: gym membership and protein shakes vs. Snickers for breakfast in bed 🍫💪 Talk about tough life choices! Looks like the Snickers won the battle this time. Who needs abs when you've got chocolate, right? 🤷♂️ #MidlifeCrisisGoals" -
Commentary:
Ah, the infamous pile of clothes, the mysterious entity that defies all logic and grows taller with each passing day! 👕🧦 It's like a magical creature playing a never-ending game of Jenga on your bed! 🌟 Who knew laundry could be so mischievous and persistent? Perhaps it's time to call for backup – the laundry fairy, anyone? 🧚♂️✨ -
Commentary:
Sounds like you may need a "Sushi" mattress instead! 🍣🛏️ Maybe next time go for a softer option to avoid feeling like you're sleeping on a tempura shrimp! 🍤😄 #CrunchyMattressProblems 🛌🚫 -
Commentary:
"Who needs sleep when you can debate like a pro? 😂🌙 Keep those argumentative skills sharp and those bags under your eyes even sharper! 💤💥 #SleeplessSass"
Top Funny Bed Quotes 🔥
- An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!
- Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- The empty spot in your bed is for snacks, not liars.
- You look like the type of person that would fart in bed and Dutch Oven yourself.
- Brushing your teeth at night is a hellish chore. Walking from bed to bathroom feels harder than working in the mines all day. I’m getting pissed just thinking about it.
For even more funny bed quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇
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