23 Funny company quotes

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

  Commentary:
  "Applying for a job online is like sending your resume into a black hole and then getting interviewed like you were hand-picked by the heavens above 🌟💼 It's like, hey, I applied because I need a job and you had openings – it's not rocket science! 🚀😂"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

  Commentary:
  "Being called a 'customer' after that one wild online shopping spree is like getting a 'Hey, stranger' text from a one-time Tinder match – let's keep it casual, corporations! 🛍️🥂 #WeAreNotThatSerious"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the age-old game of conversing with oneself, with a sidekick presence to maintain a shred of normalcy. 🤪 Just remember, two heads are better than one, even if one of them is technically yours! 😂"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

  Commentary:
  It's like they're saying, "Please enjoy our beverages responsibly, but also, please buy more." 🍻😜

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic Catch-22 of job applications – it's like trying to choose your favorite ice cream flavor without ever tasting them 🍦😂 But hey, who knows, maybe you'll end up falling head over heels for a company you didn't even know existed! Life's full of surprises, after all. Just keep those cover letters sincere and the interview smiles genuine – you never know what magic could happen! ✨🤝 #JobSearchChronicles

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

  Commentary:
  "Reading between the lines of a 'Come grow with us' sign: Get ready to sprout some extra arms and legs, because you're in for a multi-tasking marathon! 🌱💼🏃‍♂️ #TeamOfOne"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: If you’re bored when you’re alone, obviously you’re in bad company.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, well, if you find yourself twiddling your thumbs when you're flying solo, maybe it's time to have a heart-to-heart with your own reflection! 🤔🔍 Remember, the best company you can keep is with yourself – unless you happen to be a ghost whisperer! 👻😜

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, well 🍌🍭… so apparently candy companies have been living double lives as fruit connoisseurs, huh? 😂 Who knew they had such a keen sense of taste buds when it comes to bananas! Talk about a sweet deception! 🍬🍌🤥

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I’m camping, I won’t be covered.

  Commentary:
  Looks like your insurance company is pitching a real "in-tents" policy! 🏕️🙈 Remember folks, when it comes to camping, don't let your insurance leave you out in the cold… or out of the tent! 😂 #CampersNightmare

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

  Commentary:
  "Smooth jazz really pushing the boundaries of patience, huh? 🎷🤔 Keep holding on, the hold music symphony isn't over yet! 🎶😅 #SmoothJazzTorture"

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