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Is everything expensive or am I just poor? - 76 shares on Threads this week.
I think I’m about six months away from the perfect ‘before’ picture. - 90 shares on X this week.
If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house. - 77 shares on Threads this week.
God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.” - 69 shares on Threads this week.
Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead. - 81 shares on Threads this week.

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Updated: 1 minute ago

Funny quotes » frequent

Funny frequent quotes

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

Posted on23 hours ago

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

Posted on3 days ago

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