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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Netflix has every movie except the one you want to watch.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

All the wrong decisions in this country are based on the fact that my balcony faces out the back and so I can’t speak to the people.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Seeing my kids getting along, laughing, and peacefully playing together is the best minute of my day.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I love how one day my body just decided “You know what you really need is some ear hair.”

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

If they treat you like an option, leave them like a choice, and make your exit as dramatic as a Netflix season finale.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Laptops become possessed with slowness when they see that you are in a hurry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

827 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,989

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,989

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment.

Spotted on Instagram:

My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

Just shared via Discord:

Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I don’t hold grudges. I just remember facts very aggressively.

Just shared via TikTok:

I wish I had a friend like me.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Just shared via Snapchat:

People always ask me “Do you believe in God?” and I say of course it’s important to have self-belief.

Just shared via X:

When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

827 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,989

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,989

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

I usually decompose after work rather than decompress.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

My brain logged me out due to inactivity, and I can’t remember the password.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

You’re telling me people get eight hours of sleep? Like in one night?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they don’t know what it means.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Dentists get rich by staring into your mouth for 30 seconds, playing sinking ships with their assistant, and then telling you to brush better.

Making waves on Telegram:

A guy in the parking lot saw me trip over my own feet so I yelled to him “I just quantum leaped into this body!”

Seen just now on Discord:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Just landed via WeChat:

Stop making Fast and Furious movies.

Reported on Discord:

Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

Going viral on Reddit:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

Reported on Threads:

My kids are smart but sometimes they say dumb stuff like, “Mom, why do you always buy Snickers when you’re the only one who likes them?”

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