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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

If every day is a gift, today is socks.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Is it better to beat someone to the punch or punch someone to the beat?

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Some women seated next to me are gossiping in French. They obviously think I’m some dumb American who doesn’t speak French and they are correct.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

904 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,066

Funny Quotes Topics

14,007

Funny Quotes Images

11,066

4 minutes ago

3,444

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Zoom is really only for one thing: realizing our dream of staring at ourselves while talking to other people.

Just landed via Reddit:

Unless you’re dead wearing a sheet, you got no business ghosting people.

Trending via Pinterest:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

Shared recently on Messenger:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I run a parody bank account.

Live now on Discord:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Seen just now on Slack:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I will never stop being a quitter!

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

No, he didn’t ghost you, you just left him speechless, forever.

Home » Funny Lone Person Quotes

Funny lone person quotes

New funny lone person quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: “Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Commentary:
Ah, yes, the classic dilemma of modern society: Is that person really just using Bluetooth, or have they fully embraced the insanity of public soliloquies? 🤔🎧🤪 It's like a real-life game of "Guess the Tech or Guess the Heck"! 🤣🔊 Just another day in the unpredictable world of human behavior!

For even more funny lone person quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny lone person quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

904 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,066

Funny Quotes Topics

14,007

Funny Quotes Images

11,066

4 minutes ago

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I got fired for telling customers if they wanted “smoking or non-smoking”. Apparently, the correct term in the funeral home business is “cremation or burial”.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Micro-dosing time travel by going to bed.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them, you should change them regularly, and you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.

Trending via YouTube:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Just landed via Twitch:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Breaking via Twitch:

They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

Going viral on X:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I like how people say “travel safely” like I’m the one flying the plane.

Just landed via WeChat:

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

Going viral on TikTok:

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

Trending via Instagram:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

Spotted on Pinterest:

Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

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