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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I like to listen to the national anthems during the award ceremonies. I’m into country music.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Feels like the Chinese government turned up the power on the sleepy ray they use on me every morning.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

He probably follows so many women because he believes in elevating their voices.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

To everyone I’ve wronged this year. Next year same time, same place.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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2021 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,183

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14,938

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12,183

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3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

Twitter is like a mental hospital where everyone thinks they are the only sane person and everyone else is crazy.

Just landed via WeChat:

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

Just shared via YouTube:

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Get a puppy if you are in the market for a best friend who gets you up early so she can bite you excitedly.

Making waves on Reddit:

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Stop bringing shitty Bluetooth speakers on hikes. No one came to the woods to hear you listen to Katy Perry.

Just shared via Threads:

For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

Live now on Pinterest:

Irregardless, for all intensive purposes, I could care less.

Making waves on Threads:

The secret to a clean home? Never let your husband or children in.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2021 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,183

Funny Quotes Topics

14,938

Funny Quotes Images

12,183

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Whoever invented the “skip intro” button really understood humans.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I like running because it’s cheaper than paying for a gym membership. If the gym wants the money I owe them, they’ll have to catch me.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Girls really only want one simple thing; and that one thing is all of your attention.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

I love to sleep, I wish I could get paid to sleep.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park, but it’s just really hard to find thirty-two of them willing to do it.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Might go to prison so I can focus on the gym properly.

Making waves on X:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Don’t ask me for work advice, I’m just going to tell you to quit your job.

Reported on Facebook:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

Trending via Twitch:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

Spotted on Instagram:

The Bloodhound Gang were very special because its music for 12-year-old boys, but every reference requires you to be 40 years old.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Gaslighting myself into thinking I’m in a good mood.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

Making waves on Twitch:

Winnie the Pooh had the right idea in this goddam heat. Crop top with his honey pot facing the world.

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