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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

As soon as the sun comes back out, I want a beer. It’s science.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

It was the worst of times, it was the worst of times.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

I just be minding my business, and next thing you know, a payment is due.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

Toddlers negotiate like tiny mob bosses: it’s the hard way or the harder way.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,549

Funny Quotes Topics

16,781

Funny Quotes Images

14,549

Nov 27, 2025

3,854

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

I get writer’s block responding to people.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Just shared via WeChat:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

Breaking via Messenger:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Fellas, if your lady is mad, ask her if it’s because she’s put on some weight. That’ll calm her down.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

User: the word computer professionals use when they mean ‘idiot.’

Seen just now on Discord:

My bed has a stronger influence on me than my ambitions.

Just landed via Messenger:

Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.

Just shared via Discord:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Home » Funny Oldy Quotes

Funny oldy quotes

New funny oldy quotes 👇

3 weeks ago

Commentary:
Seems like the oldies station is having a rebellious phase! 😜🎶 Who knew the 80s would become the new "oldies"? Time to crank up the volume and groove to some retro tunes like it's 1985 all over again! 💃🕺 #ThrowbackTunes #ForeverYoung

80s, audacity, music, nostalgia, oldy, parents, playing, station

All funny oldy quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,549

Funny Quotes Topics

16,781

Funny Quotes Images

14,549

Nov 27, 2025

3,727

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Relationship status: my sex robot filed a restraining order.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Pets don’t talk because the moment they do, the government will tax them.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

We’re so close to “Let’s circle back next year” season, I can taste it.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Turns out, sitting on the porch, feeding birds and squirrels, is a pretty good treatment for depression.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Taylor Swift’s most unrealistic lyric is “he’d never tell you, but he can play guitar”, because I’ve never met a man who can play guitar that isn’t gonna tell you about it.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

Just landed via Instagram:

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

Shared recently on X:

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Trending via Facebook:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Going viral on YouTube:

What, and I cannot stress this enough, day is it.

Going viral on Twitch:

Every time you give someone the benefit, they deliver the doubt.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Going viral on X:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Trending via Slack:

I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.

Seen just now on Slack:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

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