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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Are you there, bathroom walls, ceiling, floor, mirror, sink, and towels? It’s me, the kids toothpaste.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

I never oversleep in the mornings. I set an alarm and a back-up alarm. Plus, there’s also a noisy kid once those fail.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Tai Chi is so crazy because it’s like throwing a slow motion tantrum.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Normalize talking to people in the gym who have earbuds in, they love that.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Patience: something you have when there are too many witnesses around.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Can we take a moment to celebrate the little ride we get in the pneumatic chair at the hair salon or barber when they pump it up or down?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

My Mom say that everyone has a beautiful side, so I guess I’m a circle.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my horniest.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

I have two dogs: one dominates, the other is a subwoofer.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,953

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Me, adding fuel to the fire: I’m just here to help.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

“It’s not that deep.” Of course it’s not. With a shallow mind like yours, nothing ever is.

Making waves on Facebook:

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

Just landed via Pinterest:

The lion does not concern himself with attaching a cover letter.

Shared recently on X:

When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

Just landed via YouTube:

It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Are they honking at me because I’m cute or because I can’t drive.

Going viral on Threads:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Did you know 17 muscles are activated when you’re crying? Fitness is my passion.

Trending via WeChat:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

Funny thrones quotes

Funny Thrones quotes bring a hilarious twist to the epic world of dragons and kings 🐉👑 Whether you’re a die-hard fan or just love a good laugh, these witty lines will have you chuckling like a Lannister counting gold 💰😂 Get ready to relive your favorite moments with a side of humor that’s as sharp as Valyrian steel ⚔️🔥 Dive in and let the fun begin!

New funny thrones quotes 👇

All funny thrones quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Telegram this month:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

100 shares on Slack this month:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.

16 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

33 shares on X this month:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? Here, but fatter.

74 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

93 shares on Facebook this month:

Traded my Fitbit in for a Sitbit.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to middle age. “I carried a watermelon” has gone from a movie quote to something you tell your orthopedist.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s nothing like sitting by an open fire and watching the evidence burn.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Narcissus fell in love with his own image, but was immediately annoyed at how it always tried to talk while he was talking.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t care for small talk. I prefer awkward silence.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Thought I would mix things up today and sit in a new spot on my couch. Absolute chaos over here.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,613

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Crazy how every smart person recommends going for walks.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Relationship status: We have changed from “I love you” to “I love YouTube”.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

You know the nap is good when it left you marks.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

I like riding by myself so I can replay 1 song 111 times with no complaints.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

My kids are asking for another dog that I can feed and walk.

Seen just now on X:

Spewing nonsense online is the most fun a depressed person is allowed to have in these twisted times.

Spotted on TikTok:

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I don’t remember if I was 43 or 44 before my birthday, so now I don’t know if I’m 44 or 45. That’s your 40’s.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Why are “hemorrhoids” not called “assteroids”?

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Just landed via Slack:

Those who still fit in their wedding dresses years later haven’t been making enough effort eating.

Going viral on Telegram:

The USA is having so many disasters and tragedies, you’d almost think it was built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds.

Going viral on Twitch:

Unpopular Opinion: Die Hard is a Harry Potter movie. He sneaks around a tower at night avoiding Alan Rickman.

Shared recently on Threads:

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

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