Funny quotes wake

60 Funny wake quotes

Now I know why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour.

4 days ago

The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

4 days ago

That awkward moment when everything is going so perfectly… and then you wake up.

2 weeks ago

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

3 weeks ago

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

1 month ago

Wake me up when I’m rich!

1 month ago

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

1 month ago

If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

1 month ago

Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.

1 month ago

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

1 month ago

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors.

1 month ago

Just once I’d like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear “Monday has been cancelled,” and then go back to sleep.

1 month ago

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

2 months ago

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

2 months ago

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

3 months ago

My body is in shock this morning from having to wake up early and wear hard pants.

3 months ago

Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.

3 months ago

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

3 months ago

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

3 months ago

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

3 months ago