123 Funny wish quotes

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs the stress of parenting when you can just swoop in for the fun parts as a grandparent? 🤷‍♂️👴🧓 Here's to hoping science can help fast-track us to grandkid heaven! 🧪👶 #GrandparentGoals"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Dear God, make me a bird so I can fly. Fly far, far away and also so I can poop on people.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'bird' request: asking for freedom, soaring high, and of course, a bit of mischief with the pooping privileges 💩🦅 Just remember, with great flying power comes great responsibility… and potentially messy consequences! Watch out below! 😄"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal struggle between wanting to be mysterious and the inability to filter our thoughts! 🤐 It's like trying to keep a lid on a pot of boiling pasta… you know it's gonna spill over eventually! 😜 Embrace your inner chatterbox, my friend – your honesty is the real mystery! 🤫✨"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the modern day dilemma of confirming existence before sending birthday wishes – it's like a digital wellness check! 🎉👴🏼👵🏽 #FriendshipGoals #DigitalAgeConfusion"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: They should invent a Sunday that’s longer than a couple of minutes.

  Commentary:
  Oh, absolutely! We definitely need a Sunday that doesn't vanish in the blink of an eye! 🕰️☀️ Maybe we can call it "Sund-ayyyy" – a day so long, you might even have time for a second brunch! 🥞🍳🤣 #MakeSundaysGreatAgain

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.

  Commentary:
  "If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it's a gummy bear 🐻🍬! At least I can enjoy the sweetness of victory 😄."

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs subtlety when you can be an elephant in the room? 🐘💥 Take up space, make your presence known, and always remember – elephants never forget to make a statement! 😄🎉 #StandOut"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal quest for true passion – a journey as elusive as finding the perfect LinkedIn profile picture! 🤣 Maybe one day we'll all be "thrilled" to update our skills section too! #LinkedInStruggles

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I wish I could just drop my body off at the gym and pick it up later.

  Commentary:
  "Wouldn't that be just the dream? 🏋️‍♀️💪 No need for sweating or grunting, just a quick gym drop-off! Oh well, back to reality where we actually have to put in the work ourselves. 😅 #WishfulThinking"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

  Commentary:
  🚁🪰 "When life gives you a garden and a whimsical dream, why not give helicopter trapping a gleam? Wishing you all the luck in the world, may your 'H' stand for 'Hover' and not 'Hilarious!' 🪂🪶"

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