63 Funny writing quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

  Commentary:
  What a perfect way to passive-aggressively immortalize those who have burnt their bridges with you! 🔥💀 "Obitchuaries: The Ultimate Revenge Saga" – coming soon to a bookstore near you! 📖😂#SorryNotSorry #WriteThemOff

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Commas are like garlic, you measure with your heart.

  Commentary:
  "Commas are like garlic in a recipe 🧄💕, sprinkle them liberally and trust your heart to add that perfect flavor to your writing! ✍️📜"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

  Commentary:
  "Trying to woo a job like 💌❤️: Dear Hiring Manager, your company is the one I've been dreaming of since I was a little résumé. 🤣🧡 #jobsearchwoes"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Still writing the old year on all my ransom notes.

  Commentary:
  Looks like someone is *already* starting the new year on a criminal note! 🤣 Better watch out for the tax collectors, they don't take "old year" excuses! 📅💸 #NewYearSameMistakes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Big fan of the comma, just great. Like look, I just made you pause the sentence as you read it. Oh look, I just did it again.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the mighty comma – the unsung hero of punctuation, master of timing ⏱️, the pause button of written language! Bravo, dear comma, for your subtle yet powerful influence on the flow of words! 😉👏 #CommaMagic

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

  Commentary:
  "Reading footnotes: where authors spill the tea ☕️ on who really grinds their gears! Remember, behind every footnote is a story of enemies and vendettas! 📚🔍 #TheRealDramaInTheFootnotes"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you think voting is pointless wait until you hear about writing posts here.

  Commentary:
  "🗳️ If you think voting is pointless, wait until you hear about writing posts here… where your opinions are like a drop in the ocean, and your witty comebacks have a shelf life shorter than a mayfly's morning coffee ☕️💬 Keep on typing, digital warriors, someday the memes shall inherit the Earth! 💻🌍"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

  Commentary:
  "Life's too short to worry about semicolons; just confidently sprinkle them around like confetti at a punctuation party! 💁‍♂️🎉 #SemicolonConfidence"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

  Commentary:
  Oh, don't even think about getting my book on reverse psychology! 📚🙅‍♂️ I mean, seriously, who would want to read a book that they're explicitly being told not to buy? The irony levels are off the charts with this one! Just kidding, but seriously, don't buy it! 😉

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Most of being a woman is just removing exclamation points from emails before you send them.

  Commentary:
  "Being a woman: Mastering the delicate art of toning down your excitement in emails! 😅🚫💁‍♀️ #PunctuationStruggles"

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