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Commentary:
"If being ignored were an Olympic sport, you'd definitely win the gold medal! Maybe we should start calling you 'Terms and Conditions' – at least that way people might actually read your messages!"

condition, humor, ignore, joke, name, relationship, sarcasm, term, terms

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Rewatching Avengers: Age of Ultron. Despite the title, they never tell you how old Ultron is.

0

4 days ago

age, Age of Ultron, Avengers, film, humor, joke, movie, never, old, rewatching, superhero, tell, title, Ultron
We should be able to take our arms off when we go to sleep, we have the technology.

0

2 months ago

able, arms, convenience, funny idea, humor, idea, should, sleep, take, technology
The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

0

2 months ago

aliens, channel, development, going, history, History Channel, humanity, humor, instrumental, learn, learning, television
My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

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5 months ago

carry, case, childhood, daughter, having, humor, just, making, memory, nostalgia, parent, payphone, quarter, remember
My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

0

4 weeks ago

family, future, future husband, humor, husband, i, joke, kid, kids, parent, parenting, parents, stay-at-home, stay-at-home parent, work
“Stop overthinking.” Oh, wow. Hadn’t considered that. Solved.

0

2 months ago

advice, humor, irony, mindset, oh, overthinking, problem, problem-solving, sarcasm, solving, stop

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Coke Zero sounds like a government pledge to eliminate fizzy drinks by 2030.

74 shares on WeChat this month:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

40 shares on Threads this month:

You should be able to call in sad to work.

15 shares on Slack this month:

Boys say that girls are dramatic, but have you ever plucked a man’s eyebrow? They act like they’ve been shot.

59 shares on Telegram this month:

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

I hate it when I do the math about where my money went, and it all adds up. No one robbed me; I didn’t lose it. It was really all me.

17 shares on TikTok this month:

People who remember to drink water, what’s that like?

42 shares on Telegram this month:

Calm yourself, Lucifer. You did the right thing coming to me for advice.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

58 shares on Pinterest this month:

I literally never want to be the bigger person again. We can both go to hell.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

No Botox. I need to furrow my brow when people say dumb things.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

I’m at the age where drinking a cup of coffee now makes me feel like Popeye scarfing down a can of spinach.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Having a low-quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

This entire year has been the Nightmare Before Christmas.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Playing Mortal Kombat at an arcade in the 90’s would fix me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

My nephew asks so many questions that Alexa just told him it’s okay to bathe with the toaster.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Pinterest:

I only see psychics so that I can keep arguing with dead relatives.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

Making waves on WeChat:

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

Making waves on WeChat:

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

Shared recently on Discord:

I tiptoe near my medicine cabinet because I don’t want to wake my sleeping pills.

Seen just now on Instagram:

You’re all badass until that dust bunny in the corner is a real spider.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You know you’re getting old when you’re entering your birth year online and you need to spin that thing like you’re on wheel of fortune.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

You don’t know about stupidity until your female friends open up about their love life.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Rewatching Avengers: Age of Ultron. Despite the title, they never tell you how old Ultron is.

We should be able to take our arms off when we go to sleep, we have the technology.

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

“Stop overthinking.” Oh, wow. Hadn’t considered that. Solved.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨