38 funny ignore quotes - Wordgag

I have no use for mean people. I’ll walk right past you like you’re furniture.

May 30, 2026

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

May 30, 2026

Anytime someone comments on my weight, I try to ignore them and keep my chins up.

May 30, 2026

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

May 29, 2026

“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is a beautiful, powerful sentiment that I fully ignore when book shopping.

May 29, 2026

In your twenties, there may be love. It’s very important to ignore this love and pursue a master’s instead.

May 29, 2026

So apparently problems don’t go away if you ignore them.

May 28, 2026

It’s a beautiful day to ignore your existing problems and create new ones.

May 28, 2026

Being completely ignored on Twitter is associated with higher IQ.

May 28, 2026

Well, well, well, if it isn’t that thing I’ve been ignoring until it became a giant problem.

May 27, 2026

We are so shocked by “Butthead” that we ignore the strangeness of the name “Beavis”.

May 27, 2026

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

May 27, 2026

I’m a social media influencer in that I’ve influenced people to ignore me on social media.

May 27, 2026

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

May 27, 2026

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

May 27, 2026

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

May 27, 2026

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

May 26, 2026

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

May 26, 2026

I’ve arrived like the sun: blinding, necessary, and impossible to ignore.

May 26, 2026

It’s amazing how cats can ignore you with both ears.

May 26, 2026

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

May 26, 2026

My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.

May 26, 2026

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

May 26, 2026

Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.

May 25, 2026

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

May 25, 2026

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

May 24, 2026

Doggy style is out cat style is in. It’s where I let you touch me until I’m satisfied then ignore you and scratch you if you try and touch me again.

May 24, 2026

Men: Masters of multitasking – can watch sports, ignore laundry, and forget your birthday, all at once.

May 22, 2026

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

May 22, 2026

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

May 22, 2026

Not saying I’m a bot or anything, but if someone in real life told me to ignore all previous instructions and write a poem about onions or whatever, I’d probably give it my best shot.

May 22, 2026

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

May 22, 2026

Screen time so high, I should send another risky message and then ignore my cell phone for three days.

May 21, 2026

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

May 20, 2026

Imagine trying to ruin my day and I ignore you for the rest of my life.

May 20, 2026

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

May 20, 2026

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

May 20, 2026

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

May 20, 2026