Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡น has shared:

My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ has viewed:

I am cassette tape years old.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

Pleasing everyone, that’s impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

โ€œIโ€™m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

You think youโ€™re cool and then you see a video of yourself running.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

What kind of psychopath wants to be the life of the party?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

In other news, congrats to my therapist for securing a 4 year contract with me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

Itโ€™s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Breaking via Threads:

When I’m in a good mood, I go to my blocked list and release one or two prisoners.

Spotted on YouTube:

I don’t need therapy, I need a bagel with cream cheese.

Reported on WhatsApp:

Spice up your work day by drinking your coffee from a flask.

Seen just now on X:

How can you not appreciate a drunk text? Someone is absolutely off their face and still thinking of you.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Ending my thesis paper with โ€œbut who cares what I think?โ€

Just landed via YouTube:

Iโ€™m a people pleaser, unless you donโ€™t like that. Then Iโ€™m not.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked. Iโ€™m a family of 8.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
"Just like how I can't reach the last slice of pizza in the box, but clearly, I don't need it…๐Ÿ•๐Ÿšซ Lazy Rule at its finest! Who needs things that require stretchy effort anyway, right? ๐Ÿ˜‚ #LazyLife"

, , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes ๐Ÿค

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ”ฅ

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ญ has shared:

I’m not really a “glass half full” kind of person. I’m more of a “Where’d I put my glass?” kind of person.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง has viewed:

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡จ has bookmarked:

Donโ€™t interrupt me while Iโ€™m embarrassing myself.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ has viewed:

Whoever said having a crush is when you feel the most like Carrie Bradshaw was so real for that.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

Hello pollen, my old friend, my nose is running once again.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ธ has shared:

Whenever ะ† wake up and see that someone has wrั–tten a bunch of funny posts before noon, ะ† assume they are a mornั–ng drั–nker.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ง has bookmarked:

Studies show that 100% of all parents think alcohol tastes much better after spending the day with children.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going viral on Snapchat:

Whoever said โ€œout of sight, out of mindโ€ never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

Just landed via Facebook:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

Seen just now on Slack:

I’m glad I have boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.

Just shared via X:

Iโ€™d change my name to laundry if it meant youโ€™d think about doing me every day.

Spotted on Messenger:

I need to get my shit together, but at this point, I’m waiting to see if the world is going to end before I put any real effort in.

Just landed via Messenger:

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Reported on Instagram:

Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Name a better duo than sad and depressed.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Share Wordgag ๐Ÿ™

ยฉ 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with โค๏ธ in Sydney โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒด