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Commentary:
"Ah, the ancient art of parenting: Establish dominance by unleashing your inner 'whine-master' 🤣👑 Who knew the key to ruling the playground was a well-timed meltdown? 🤪 #ParentingProTips"

authority, children, dominance, humor, over, parenting, whining

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Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Reddit this month:

Super excited about a brand new week of faking it.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

That little pocket on jeans is the perfect size for the money I have left over after I pay all my bills.

86 shares on Threads this month:

Genuinely nothing worse than going bowling with people who are actually good. Like, why are you doing all that?

90 shares on Discord this month:

What’s it called when you mentally want to be horny but you’re physically not at all?

55 shares on Reddit this month:

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

Why do plane tickets have to be so expensive? You’re literally going that way anyway. Just give me a ride.

15 shares on X this month:

Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

71 shares on Snapchat this month:

The worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person.

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

74 shares on YouTube this month:

Catching me in person is rare. I move like a ghost.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

This meeting could have been a cave painting.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

After all these years, Jude Law has finally noticed me and responded to my love letters. Something about staying 500 feet away. I’m getting it framed.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

What have I done to deserve this? Oh yeah, right, I remember.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

The new generation will never know what heartbreak feels like with wired headphones that have a loose connection.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

I am convinced that at least half of you are bots.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Making waves on Threads:

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Trending via Pinterest:

“Those tattoos will make it harder to get a job!” Okay, well so will my personality.

Going viral on Telegram:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Seen just now on Threads:

What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

Going viral on Telegram:

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Spotted on YouTube:

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

Going viral on TikTok:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

There’s nothing I hate more than being comfy in bed and suddenly needing to pee.

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

Keep the laugh going 😂

There’s nothing I hate more than being comfy in bed and suddenly needing to pee.

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

God, is there anything worse than when someone wants to show you a video?

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