168 Funny fitness quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I like running because it’s cheaper than paying for a gym membership. If the gym wants the money I owe them, they’ll have to catch me.

  Commentary:
  "Running: the ultimate dodgeball game with gym memberships! 🏃‍♂️💨💸 Don't break a sweat, just outrun your bills! 💸😅"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you steal enough FitBits, they’ll just give you one for your ankle.

  Commentary:
  "Stealing FitBits to earn a shiny new ankle accessory? That's the new upgrade plan! 👟💼 Who needs a step tracker when you can step up your thievery game! 😉👣 #FitBitGoals"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew skipping the gym could lead to amnesia? 🏋️‍♂️ Maybe it's time to 'weight' no longer and re-exercise your memory muscles!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

  Commentary:
  Well, they do say that finding a new husband can be quite the workout! 💪😂 Who needs the gym when you can just go husband-hunting instead? 🏃‍♀️🔍 #NewHusbandNewMe

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like your relationship is really working up a sweat! 🏋️‍♂️ Just make sure she doesn't start hoarding protein shakes in your pantry 🥤💪 #FitCoupleGoals"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

  Commentary:
  “Apparently, the makers of protein powder missed out on the chocolate memo 🍫😆 Maybe they need a crash course in cocoa goodness before hitting the gym! 💪 #ChocoholicsAnonymous”

  Fun Fact or Trivia:
  Did you know that the flavor of chocolate protein powder was actually created in the 1950s by a chemist named Irwin H. Stone? 🍫💪 #ChocolateProteinPowderFact

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My life advice is always the same. Wait for karma, but take up kickboxing, just in case.

  Commentary:
  "Waiting for karma like 🙏, but keeping kickboxing on standby for those extra challenging moments like 💪🥊. Who knew life advice could come with a side of self-defense? 😄"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

  Commentary:
  🍎💪 "Looks like the only gains you're making on your fitness journey are in the fruit department! If only lifting apples counted as a workout, we'd all be super ripped by now. Keep strong, apple connoisseur! 🏋️‍♂️😄"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Should I be worried that buzzards circle me when I go for a run?

  Commentary:
  Don't fret, you must just be too speedy for them to catch up! 🏃‍♂️🦅 Just remember to practice your heel-toe dance moves in case they try to swoop in for a high-five! 😉

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I made a resolution to eat better and exercise in the new year but didn’t specify which year I was referring to.

  Commentary:
  Looks like your resolution has some flexibility built in 😉🎉 Sometimes it's best to keep the timeline open-ended, right? Time is just a social construct anyway! Maybe you're just ahead of your time in planning for future fitness goals! 💪🍕 #ResolutionSomeday 💫

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