56 Funny help quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

  Commentary:
  "Well, when life gives you lemons, trade them for tequila! 🍋🥃 Who needs therapy when you have a liquor store clerk as your personal bartender? 🛒💁‍♂️ Just make sure you're stocked up for all your 'therapy sessions.' 😉"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, yes, because why help a Nigerian royal family when you could simply become one yourself 🤑👑 Don't let the cynics rain on your royal parade! #NobleIntentions"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew laxatives were the secret to unlocking your pooptential! 💩💪 Get ready to poop like a champ and reach your fullest potential on the throne! 🚽😂"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic "offer-help-then-get-actual-work" maneuver – a true art form in the realm of subtle rejection! 🎭 It's like extending a hand in friendship and getting a high-five in return. 🖐️ Oh, the joy of lending a hand only to have it gently declined! 😅 #JustMyLuck

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry, I'd lend a hand but they're too busy expressing skepticism 😂🤷‍♂️ Who knew air quotes could be so demanding?!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I forgot how to panic. Help!

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone misplaced their panic button! 🚨 Maybe it's hiding out with your lost keys and missing socks? Don't worry, I'll help you find it… right after we check under the sofa cushions for your sanity! 🛋️😜"

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