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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Ώ has copied:

I need a break from me.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡¬ has downloaded:

Alcohol is actually a performance-enhancing drug. But you’re not gonna like the performance.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Έ has downloaded:

It must be hard to be a rapper knowing at any moment your enemies may make beautiful poems about you.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡³ has copied:

If a man speaks in the forest and his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡² has bookmarked:

I’m terrified of escalators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡¬ has viewed:

Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¬ has copied:

We should all start texting each other like old time explorers. ‘Dearest friend, I have survived another week. The horrors persist.’

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡· has shared:

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ί has bookmarked:

I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

802 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,964

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,964

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’d stalk me too, I get it.

Freshly posted on Discord:

No one knows what I’m up to, not even me.

Reported on WhatsApp:

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I hope this email finds you at relative peace with the paradox of existence.

Shared recently on WeChat:

No crypto for me, thanks, at least not until I figure out how dollars work.

Reported on LinkedIn:

If you need me, I’ll be in the shower pretending I can sing.

Going viral on Snapchat:

The best thing capitalism has done is put a little window on pasta boxes so the noodles can look out at the world.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Whoever’s praying on my downfall, I appreciate you thinking of me.

Home Β» Funny Introduction Quotes

Funny introduction quotes

Funny introduction quotes are the perfect icebreaker to kick off any speech or post with a splash of humor πŸ˜‚πŸŽ‰ Whether you’re meeting new people or setting the vibe for a presentation, a clever and witty opener can instantly lighten the mood and grab attention πŸ‘βœ¨ Ready to make your intro unforgettable? Let’s dive into some laughs that break the ice and spark smiles from the get-go! πŸ˜„πŸ”₯

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For even more funny introduction quotes, check out the next page, if available πŸ‘‡

All funny introduction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ“ˆ

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Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

802 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,964

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,964

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ό has copied:

I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half sisters.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¨ has shared:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡² has copied:

Waiting for the websites to start offering pizza instead of just cookies.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦ has copied:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Έ has bookmarked:

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¬ has shared:

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ή has viewed:

If I were Noah, I’d bring three of every animal just to create some drama.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦ has copied:

There’s no way the Scooby Doo gang never found a dead body.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months.

Trending via Threads:

Shrimp: “When I grow up, I want to be food waste at a gala.”

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Guys only want one thing and it’s my grandmother’s meatball recipe.

Trending via Reddit:

Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

Live now on Slack:

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

Spotted on Threads:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Trending via Messenger:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

Just landed via Messenger:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

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