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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Not only is it not Friday, but it’s not even Thursday.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Dear ads, I have the buying power of a Victorian milkmaid.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

It’s Monday again and I’m about to make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Know what goes good with beer? Another one.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked, I’m 4 people.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2311 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,473

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,473

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

Reported on Slack:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Making waves on Telegram:

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Just landed via WeChat:

Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

Spotted on X:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera!

Broadcasted on Messenger:

“Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

Trending via Pinterest:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

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515 Funny love quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2311 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,473

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,473

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I know breakfastless behavior when I see it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Texting a man first feels like I’m on my hands and knees begging him to talk to me.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I’m like a candle: I’m cute, I smell nice, and there’s a pretty good chance I’ll set your curtains on fire if left unattended.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

I have a huge to-do list, I just have to figure out who’s gonna do it.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Just landed via Twitch:

First, they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I have consumed so much potato salad the last couple of days, I’m sweating mayo.

Just landed via TikTok:

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Making waves on Twitch:

Looking to sell my DeLorean. Great shape, low mileage. Only driven from time to time.

Just shared via Discord:

Every time I wanna quit, I remember horses don’t stop.

Shared recently on TikTok:

“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My child has entered the “Why?” stage of linguistic development, and I’ve realized I know absolutely nothing.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

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