Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Winter hack: Avoid the cold by never leaving your house.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

Drinking coffee because throwing chairs at people is frowned upon.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

“Boy, you made these perimenopausal ovaries come back to life,” – me flirting.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

This year I’d like an advent calendar with 24 different tranquilizers.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Rescuing a cute dog and teaching it how to drive me home from the pub.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

231 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,500

Funny Quotes Topics

17,568

Funny Quotes Images

15,500

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,723

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.

Seen just now on Threads:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Betrayal is when you’re holding a baby, and they put their arms out for someone else.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Normalize ending a hang-out abruptly by saying ‘I wanna go home now’ and then going home.

Going viral on Threads:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

Just landed via Slack:

You’re not a real baddie until a man has tried to forbid you from posting on social media.

Making waves on Discord:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Going bananas on X:

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

Funny mental chatter quotes

Funny mental chatter quotes are the perfect way to laugh at that nonstop inner dialogue 🗣️💭 swirling in your mind. When your brain won’t stop chatting, why not enjoy the humor in the chaos? 😂✨ These witty lines turn mental noise into pure entertainment, making overthinking a little more fun and a lot less serious. Ready to giggle at your own thoughts? Let’s dive in! 🎉🧠

New funny mental chatter quotes 👇

All funny mental chatter quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on X this month:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

77 shares on TikTok this month:

I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I want his favorite sports team to finish last every year for now and forever.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Called in, “I’m a time traveler. I came in today yesterday.”

42 shares on WeChat this month:

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say “repairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

82 shares on TikTok this month:

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

73 shares on X this month:

4 sneezes in a row is clout chasing. Wrap it up!

63 shares on Instagram this month:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

To anybody I hurt this year, I just wanna say you deserve it. Stop playing with me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The delivery guy absolutely hates it when I call him my pizza mule.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Most of my exercise comes from getting up to let the cat in and out.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Working with children gives you so much in return. Lice, for example.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

231 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,500

Funny Quotes Topics

17,568

Funny Quotes Images

15,500

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,633

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Had a fight with an erection this morning. Beat it single-handed.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Love is in the air fryer.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Having to choose between an old guy or a convicted felon is a perfect depiction of what dating apps are Iike.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

People aren’t too bad if you stay away from them and don’t go outside.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

One day you’ll meet that amazing person who just gets you, and they won’t text you back either.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Are they honking at me because I’m cute or because I can’t drive.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

The future is buffering.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Sex is great, but have you ever started slowly picking up speed after sitting in a traffic jam?

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

Shared recently on Twitch:

You’ll pay good money to hear a comedian say something offensive, but when I say it for free, I’m the bad guy.

Going viral on WeChat:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

Trending via X:

My talents are so hidden that I can’t even find them.

Making waves on Facebook:

The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Just imagine if farting were as contagious as yawning.

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