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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

“Huh” is 94% of my vocabulary.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Please solve a murder to prove you’re not a bot.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

I have to pee. Story of my life.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Why is everyone so chill about parrots being able to talk? That’s a whole animal. Talking.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

In case no one told you today. I’m beautiful.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to kiss today.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

12 minutes ago

3,417

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

Cashews are my favorite because they’re salty and hunched over just like me.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

According to my kids’ Christmas lists, they think this parenting gig pays pretty well.

Going viral on Discord:

No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Going viral on Twitch:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Just shared via Messenger:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Home » Funny None Quotes

Funny none quotes

Funny none quotes are the perfect mix of wit and whimsy to brighten your day 😂✨ Whether you’re in need of a chuckle or just some clever wordplay, these gems will have you laughing out loud 🤣💬 Dive into a world where humor meets honesty, and prepare for a smile explosion! 😄🔥 Ready to share the fun? Let’s get those giggles going! 🎉📢

New funny none quotes 👇

5 days ago
Share →: You got beef with me, but none in your fridge. That’s why you’re mad. You’re hungry.

Commentary:
No beef in the fridge, just a whole lot of spam 😂🥩🍔
1 week ago
Share →: None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

Commentary:
"When your phone’s more dramatic than an Oscar-winning movie! 🍿📱😂"
2 months ago
Share →: Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

Commentary:
"When your curiosity meets its match: 'Sir Nosey McNoserson, please step away from the boundaries of Businesslandia!' 🕵️‍♂️🚫🙅‍♀️"
2 months ago
Share →: If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

Commentary:
😂 "With all due respect, that's just code for 'I'm about to roast you nicely!' 🔥🤭"
2 months ago
Share →: My favorite pastime is looking for meaning where there is none.

Commentary:
Ah, the classic quest for hidden depths in a sea of nothingness! 😅 Sometimes, the best pastime is turning life's little emptinesses into grand mysteries. Who knew(just a little), that finding meaning in nothing could be your favorite hobby? 🕵️‍♂️🔍 Everything's more interesting when you're searching for gold in a sandbox—except, of course, when you realize there’s just more sand. 🏖️😉
5 months ago
Share →: I miss when bills were none of my business.

Commentary:
Ah, the good ol' days when bills were just things you'd throw on the ground from Monopoly 🎲💸 Sounds like adulthood really knows how to ruin a good time! 🙈 #AdultingStruggles
5 months ago
Share →: None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Commentary:
"Well, there goes my motivation for the week! 🤷‍♂️ Can't argue with that logic – might as well make the most of the weekend! 🎉 #YOLO #CarpeDiem"
6 months ago
Share →: Roses are red. Pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large. And none of it’s for you.

Commentary:
🌹🍕 "Roses are red, pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large, and none of it's for you. Sorry not sorry, it's a pizza party for one! Maybe next time, bring your own slice and join the fun! 🍕🎉 #PizzaLove"

For even more funny none quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny none quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

12 minutes ago

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Transgender ambulance driver whose pronouns are we/you/we/you/we/you.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

Friday the 13th used to mean something. Now every day is awful.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I hope the aliens aren’t good at basketball. My chances of making it into the NBA are already slim.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Trending via Telegram:

Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

Freshly posted on Slack:

It’s completely absurd that Silicon Valley is pushing AI on us before they figured out how to keep fries fresh for longer.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Dear unsuccessful applicant, we ultimately decided to split the role between existing staff without paying any of them extra.

Trending via Threads:

Some people aren’t just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.

Spotted on YouTube:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

Going viral on Threads:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

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