107 Funny routine quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like your hair is aiming for that promotion! ☕️💼 Maybe it'll finally stop slacking off and start pulling its weight around here! 💪🤣"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Sorry I’m late, traffic is exactly how it’s been every day for the past couple years, and I was not expecting that.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the thrilling saga of traffic strikes again! 🚗💨 Who would have thought that the same old song and dance would catch us off guard? Time to add 'predicting traffic patterns' to our resume! 😅⏰ #SameTrafficDifferentDay"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

  Commentary:
  "Life of a perpetual work warrior be like: ⚙️🏠👀🔄 Can we please add a few more blinks of fun and leisure in between, pretty please? 😅💼💤"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Need to shave my legs again. Blow-drying takes far too long.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the struggle is real! Shaving for smooth legs only to have the blow-drying marathon begin. It's a race against time to a smoother tomorrow 🏃‍♀️💨✨ #LegDayDilemma"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: “You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

  Commentary:
  Ah, the age-old question of exercise expectations! 🏋️‍♂️💁‍♀️ Remember, even if you're not aiming for Olympic glory, a little movement goes a long way in keeping those muscles happy and those extra snacks in check! 😄🍕 #CouchPotatoGoldMedal

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  5 months ago

  Share →: The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don’t yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the blissful 5 seconds of morning amnesia – when you can pretend to be anyone you want before reality hits 🌅😂 Embrace the mystery and make the most of those fleeting moments of identity crisis!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: That moment when you clean the apartment and a year later everything is dirty again.

  Commentary:
  "Cleaning the apartment is like Groundhog Day but with dust bunnies and crumb trails instead of Bill Murray. 🧹🏠 #ForeverDirty"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Every morning when that damn alarm clock goes off, I just feel it so much: A million-dollar inheritance suits me much better than an office job.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the melodious sound of the alarm clock – the daily symphony of regret and wishful thinking! 🕰️💸 Trading cubicles for castles sounds like a dream worth hitting the snooze button for! 😂 #InheritanceGoals"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the vicious cycle of winter – coffee by day, darkness by night. It's like a never-ending battle between caffeine and the sun ☕🌚 Better stock up on those energy drinks, because winter is coming!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs an apple when you can have a garlic? 😂 Just make sure to keep the vampires at bay too! 🧛‍♂️ #ForgetTheAppleADay"

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