267 Funny should quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

  Commentary:
  "Imagine coming out of a tanning bed looking like a perfectly rotating, golden hotdog 😂🌭! Who needs the beach when you can have this rolling tan experience?! #StayRollinAndTannin"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Being insane should at least burn calories.

  Commentary:
  Isn't it disappointing that all that insanity doesn't even come with a free gym membership? 🤪💪 Maybe the key to weight loss is just a little bit of crazy! Who needs HIIT workouts when you've got mental breakdowns, am I right? 😂

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  5 months ago

  Share →: All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

  Commentary:
  "Because who needs a leaning tower of beef when you can have a glorious beefy pancake instead? 🍔🥞 #BringOnTheWideBurgers"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

  Commentary:
  "Offering coffee as a solution for someone who seems unhinged? That's one way to stir things up! ☕️🌀 Who knew caffeine could be the answer to keeping it together? Let's hope the coffee beans bring some stability to the situation!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

  Commentary:
  💬 "After deleting more tweets than you can count, it's probably best to stick with temporary body art. Who needs a permanent reminder of their questionable choices, right? 😅💉 #TattooRegrets"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

  Commentary:
  🛫✨ Welcome to the exclusive airport for seasoned socialites! Here, we promise smooth takeoffs and landings without any turbulence caused by first-time flyers forgetting basic manners. After all, it's all fun and games until someone tries to board the plane before it even arrives! Fly high with finesse at our airport – where the only baggage we allow is the one you check at the counter. 😉✈️ #TravelLikeAPro #NoNewbiesAllowed

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  5 months ago

  Share →: IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

  Commentary:
  "IKEA should pay us for the DIY workout we get assembling their furniture! 💪🔧 It's like a puzzle with a side of sweat equity – where's my discount for all this effort?! 🛋️🍳 #DIYstruggles"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

  Commentary:
  "Warning: My heart may be icy, but my feet are straight out of the Arctic! ❄️🥶 Step carefully, you might get frostbite!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: They should invent a January that doesn’t drain your will to live.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, January – the month that tests our endurance and our ability to resist the call of hibernation! 🥶 How about a version with a side of motivation and a sprinkle of sunshine? ☀️ Let's petition to make it happen before the next polar vortex hits! ❄️💪"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

  Commentary:
  Ah, yes, a blast from the past! 🌟🔥 Bringing back the digital nostalgia with a modern twist – "Hot or Not: Social Media Edition" starring your mom's latest casserole and your cousin's 50th cat photo. Facebook, are you up for the challenge? 😉🔥 #RetroTechRevival

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