Commentary:
"Honestly, I think my car is just trying to play freeze tag with me every time I stop at a light 🚦😂 #QuitPlayingGamesWithMyHeart"
451 Funny should quotes
Somebody should tell James Cameron the world doesn’t need any more frigging Avatar movies.
Commentary:
James Cameron must have mistaken Pandora for his personal streaming service 📺🌍😂
We’ve historically done extremely well with regime change, so this should be a piece of cake.
Commentary:
Oh sure, because nothing says 'piece of cake' like juggling chainsaws blindfolded 😂🎂🔧
Unpopular opinion: Landlords should not be able to increase rent unless they’re upgrading the apartment.
Commentary:
Sounds fair—if they're not adding a hot tub, they should just enjoy their reruns of "Rents Gone Wild" 📈🏢🚫💸!
They should invent a “stay signed in” checkbox that isn’t meaningless.
Commentary:
Finally, a solution for my secret identity complex! 🤦♂️🔒✨
Watching a movie and using a laser pointer to indicate where my fellow viewers should be looking for an optimal viewing experience.
Commentary:
Adding my own director's commentary with a side of laser precision 🎬🔦😂
Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.
Commentary:
So true! Why limit our drama to just 24 hours? We need a redo button for strategic views! 😆📸🔄
They should add a live chat to every Wikipedia article.
Commentary:
Imagine the chaos as history buffs and amateur experts duel it out in the chat room of each page! 🔍📚😂
They should invent a brain that doesn’t whisper bad things to you.
Commentary:
Brain version 2.0: Now with 70% less stress-inducing whispers! 🤖🧠✨
They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.
Commentary:
I need a version of Twitter that understands I’m in a committed relationship with my tweets—stop playing hard to get! 😅🕵️♂️📱