38 Funny silence quotes

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  2 weeks ago

  View →: Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: Adulting has stunned me into silence. I have no thoughts, no remarks and no commentary at the moment.
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  3 weeks ago

  View →: Traveling long distance without earphones feels like you’re serving a jail term.
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  4 weeks ago

  View →: “Why don’t you tell us anything anymore?” I’ve updated my privacy policy.
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  4 weeks ago

  View →: I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Silence is golden. But duct tape is silver.
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  3 months ago

  View →: A moment of silence for everything I have to do but am not doing.
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  3 months ago

  View →: I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Noise-canceling headphones aren’t enough, I need everyone to shut up.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I would pay extra for a dental hygienist who was comfortable with silence.
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  4 months ago

  View →: A real smartphone would know when to shut up.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Hate when people ask “why is it called Silence of the Lambs?” Like, did you hear any lambs during the movie? Use your head!
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  4 months ago

  View →: Alexa, mute my children.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.
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  4 months ago

  View →: My favorite voicemails are those where the person doesn’t leave one.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”
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  4 months ago

  View →: Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Why is judge the only job where you can bang a little hammer to make people shut up? I’ve needed that in literally every job I’ve had.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I read that Miley Cyrus will be starring in a remake of Silence of the Lambs. She’ll be playing Hannibal Montannibal.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.
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  4 months ago

  View →: You should be able to mute someone in real life. Annoying coworker? Silence them for 24 hours by booping them on the nose!
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  4 months ago

  View →: When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I’m fighting for free speech. Mine, not yours, so be quiet.
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  4 months ago

  View →: What I’ve learned in all these years of marriage is how to open a bottle of beer silently.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Even worse than the buzzing of the mosquitoes is the moment when it suddenly stops.
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  4 months ago

  View →: A moment of silence for the paycheck that was in my account for five minutes.
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  4 months ago

  View →: More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

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