Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: I really want an emotional support octopus so I can train it to slap people and shoplift.

Commentary:
"Imagine the chaos and surprise an emotional support octopus could bring – slapping away negativity and snagging some steals like a true partner in crime 🐙💥🛍️ Who needs therapy when you've got a mollusk sidekick for all your outlandish shenanigans?"
6 months ago
Share →: I already know how it will end. One of my children will unplug my life support to charge their phone.

Commentary:
"Looks like it's not just the Wi-Fi that's getting disconnected, but grandma too! 📱💀 #FamilyPriorities"
6 months ago
Share →: Me, adding fuel to the fire: I’m just here to help.

Commentary:
"Me, casually strolling in with a bottle of gasoline: Oh, just doing my bit to ignite the party! 🔥😄 #HelpfulIndeed"
6 months ago
Share →: Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Commentary:
"Who needs dating apps when you can have the riveting experience of conversing with tech support for hours without any progress 😂💔 #ModernDatingStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: The first thing you learn to draw in art school is money from your parents bank account.

Commentary:
Ah, the timeless tradition of mastering the fine art of withdrawing funds from the Bank of Mom and Dad before diving into the world of creativity! 💸🎨 Remember, every masterpiece begins with a generous brushstroke of financial support! 😉 #ArtSchoolStruggles
6 months ago
Share →: My therapist says he can’t take any more of my talk and that I should join a group. So, here I am.

Commentary:
"Well, looks like this therapist decided to hand you over like a hot potato 🥔🌶️ But hey, don't worry, group therapy can be like a stand-up comedy show with a touch of emotional support 🤝🎤🤣 So get ready to share the spotlight and spread some laughs… or tears 😅😭 #GroupTherapyJourney"
6 months ago
Share →: You may think no one is there for you, but there’s laundry. Laundry is always there for you.

Commentary:
"Feeling ignored and unloved? Fear not, for there is always laundry waiting to embrace you with open arms…err, hangers! 🧺✨ Who needs human relationships when you have a trusty pile of clothes to fold, right? 😅 #LaundryIsBae"
6 months ago
Share →: AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Commentary:
"AI is like that friend who's constantly in your pocket, ready to chime in with advice – whether you asked for it or not! 🤖💬 Just remember to take its suggestions with a pinch of 'byte' and a whole lot of skepticism!"
6 months ago
Share →: I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question of robot transportation! 🤖🚕 Looks like even robots need a lift sometimes – and who can blame them? It's rough out there in the concrete jungle! 🌆 Keep those robot taxis running, folks – it's all part of helping our mechanical friends navigate this crazy world! 🌍🚖"
6 months ago
Share →: Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

Commentary:
"Remember, behind every smiling face lies a hidden struggle. And if you want to add more drama to their day, just casually drop in the hydration reminder – that'll really keep the battle interesting! 💧😅 #ThirstyForSomeLaughs"