87 Funny talking quotes

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the joys of aging gracefully! 👵🏼👴🏼 Less socializing, more scrutinizing! 🤣 Who needs a big circle of friends anyway when you can have a big list of grievances instead? 🤷🏻‍♂️😂 #LivingMyBestGrumpyLife"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: My neighbor won’t stop talking about his Rolex and I can’t believe someone stole it tomorrow.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like your neighbor is living in a time warp where Rolexes disappear into thin air! ⌚🌀 Maybe talking about it too much attracted a time thief… 👀 #RolexMystery"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, a conversation is like a game of hot potato – you don't want to be the one left holding the spud for too long! 🥔 Let's give others a chance to shine in the spotlight, before we start auditioning for the role of the one-person show! 🎭💬"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the betrayal! 🐶 Ignoring the hand that feeds to chat with the one that barks – it's a woof situation for sure! 🗡️💔 #StabbyLittleSecrets

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

  Commentary:
  "Well, I guess that rules out conversations with ice cubes! ❄️😆 Keep it cool and carry a thermometer, folks! 🌡️😜"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: I tried counting sheep so I can fall asleep but that got boring, so I started talking to the shepherd instead.

  Commentary:
  "Counting sheep just wasn't cutting it for this sleep-deprived individual 🐑😴 So, they decided to ditch the flock and have a midnight chat with the shepherd instead! Who needs sleep when you can have fascinating sheep talks, right? 🌙😄"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

  Commentary:
  "Sounds like someone's throwing some major 'Mom shade'! 💁‍♀️😂 Looks like we've got a secret competitor for the 'Parent of the Year' title! 🏆 #MomVsYou"

For even more funny talking quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny talking quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌