Wiping my hands on my pants before I'm shaking someone’s hand, so they spend the rest of the day wondering what I just touched.

Wiping my hands on my pants before I’m shaking someone’s hand, so they spend the rest of the day wondering what I just touched.

Commentary:
"Look at you, turning handshakes into a mysterious guessing game 🤔👖 Let the speculation begin: Was it a secret slime operation or simply a mid-meal snack? The world may never know! 🕵️‍♂️🍔 #SneakyHandshakeMoves"

Hell hath no fury like a toddler getting his nose wiped.

Hell hath no fury like a toddler getting his nose wiped.

Commentary:
Ah, the epic battle of wills between a tiny tyrant and a well-meaning parent! 😂👶🤧 It's a scene straight out of a dramatic soap opera – "As The Snot Flows"! Who will emerge victorious – the fearless mucus-wielder or the resolute nose wiper? Stay tuned for the next thrilling episode of "The Neverending Nose-Wipe"! 💪🏼👃🏼

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Commentary:
"Just remember, that perfectly contoured makeup can only do so much when faced with a bad case of the Monday blues 🌧️💄 #BeautyIsSkinDeep"